A Bit Explicit but Needful

Greetings from Vancouver, Canada

Hello my dear friends. I am alone here online. My lovely wife of 8 months has gone to work. She usually logs me off. I am a somewhat reformed porn addict. The addiction eventually took me down dark alleys with prostitutes. The addiction is gone. Almost.

This afternoon I met with a dear and trusted mentor who has done much to help me out of my addiction to porn. I used to purchase Hard core DVDs on a regular basis. By the grace of God and a strong accountability network I have stopped that folly.

My confession relates to the drive home from my dear mentor. We had a great time where I testified of great victory over porn and alcoholism (I have not drank for 9 mo). I am, for the most, part walking in purity.

All was well until we reached a few blocks from my downtown pad. Two young ladies were walking down the sidewalk. One lady gripped me. She had a tight white spandex top and an abnormally large bust which happens to be my former fetish. I was really triggered.

After my mentor dropped me off. I ran around the corner to get a quick glance. I felt like a harsh perv. I should of told my mentor what had just triggered me. I really coveted that woman. It was wrong of me.

I still have not acted out (code M) with my fantasy of that lady. I have not looked at any big bust web sites.
I am going to log off A S A P.

If it is okay I will report latter about logging off. It is important that I get off line A S A P so I don't fall.

Please pray that I do not act out on the image of that woman and that I not carry the guilt about looking at her.

God Bless ever last one of you wonderful honest people.