Desperate HouseHusband
I have been rid and free from porn when I got married. I learned the hard way. My girlfriend was 5 months pregnant when I got married. And to top that I had to confess to almost everyone I know. And in my country it was a devastating blow to me and my family. I have never been closer to God all my life by that event. that was two years ago. A few months ago I fell and after that it was all downhill I have fallen from grace. And now I`m clawing my self up agin. I feel so distance from God I`m desperate, I have tried everything I know. Confessing all over again did not help, Fasting also, I am desperate for God. I pray and nothingness is all I get. Help me none can save me but God. Please save me from this dreadful situation. I feel like cheating on my wife and not being the father I supposed to be.
I believe you have to continue doing what you have mentioned, but also trying to set small, but faithful aims for each moment. Like promising youself, God and, maybe, someone whom you trust and whom you can be accountable to that you'll pass, let's say, this particular day without going into that. If you can go for a while like that, set longer periods and just have this aim, this desire in your heart -- to be FREE. For the sake of your family, for the sake of your relationships with your Heavenly Father and His Holy Spirit in you.
As I've got from my experience of getting rid of that (that is the process and is not finished yet) than closer I am to God and than better relationships I have than less I'm tempted to sin. And vice versa, like devil wants to break, to ruin what God is building within me. But still this is important to remember that God has ALREADY won this battle for us and there is His vistory for us!
Dear brother, stay in the freedom Christ has given you and don't become a slave of sin again! God bless you!
