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Tired of being defeated
A relative was moving and had all of their belongings in our basement as a young teen. I looked through them and found a box of porn magazines. I would spend hours in the basement looking at those magazines until their things were moved. When I got older I would occassionally buy a magazine when I was in another town. After I was married I had some nude trading cards and was looking at them when my wife walked into the kitchen, I rememeber the look of hurt on her face. I didn't want to hurt her, but I know I did. We used to watch porn with our friends before we were walking with Christ. After being married for 10 years she had some health issues and it was hard for her to get aroused sexually, so we resorted to the porn to get through that time. While it worked for her and she is over it, I continue to battle it. It goes in cycles. Sometimes it will be months in between seeking it out, but when it happens, it seems like I spiral downward and can waste a day on the internet, the whole time know that isn't what God wants, but I feel like I have lost control and I hate myself. It happened again last night as the kids were away and my wife and I watched a movie on pay per view. I wasn't the husband she needs. Niether of us said we should watch it and I didn't say we shouldn't. I let her permissive attitude be my reason for doing it. I don't want this feeling anymore. I want to be what God wants me to be. I want to be the husband she needs me to be.
Ryan Adams wrote on June 25th 08 at 02:58AM
Man that really spoke to me. I am a young man in my 20's and the devil has been jacking with me about the issue with porn. I know I am an overcomer through the blood of Jesus, and I know I will over come this! Reading what you wrote helped me, because I want to be that man G_D has called me to be and I dont want to struggle with Porn any more! It always leads to masturbation and always leaves me feeling empty. Thank you for that.
Michael37 wrote on June 25th 08 at 03:27AM
Hey bro
I know that this struggle with porn is hard
and I know for a fact that God, your Creator and Father, loves you to death!! He knows that you are struggling and that you want to so get out of this. I'll be praying for you bro. But before I go let me encourage you!!
I struggled with lust and Masturbation. I just couldn't get out of it! I was entangled, trapped, frusterated and hopeless and I wanted out but my flesh was weak, out of control!! So I started looking to God for stregnth By reading and meditating on scripture, and praying to Him. I was determined to get over this, it was ruining my life and i didn't want to bring it with me the rest of the way and the only way I got out of it was by the strength God
I am praying for you I love you man Just Cling to God on this. If He brought me through my struggle, He can certainly free you from yours!! There's hope!!!!!!!!!
I know that this struggle with porn is hard
and I know for a fact that God, your Creator and Father, loves you to death!! He knows that you are struggling and that you want to so get out of this. I'll be praying for you bro. But before I go let me encourage you!!
I struggled with lust and Masturbation. I just couldn't get out of it! I was entangled, trapped, frusterated and hopeless and I wanted out but my flesh was weak, out of control!! So I started looking to God for stregnth By reading and meditating on scripture, and praying to Him. I was determined to get over this, it was ruining my life and i didn't want to bring it with me the rest of the way and the only way I got out of it was by the strength God
I am praying for you I love you man Just Cling to God on this. If He brought me through my struggle, He can certainly free you from yours!! There's hope!!!!!!!!!
Wil Dizzle Chizzle wrote on June 25th 08 at 12:16PM
@Jason
Paul wrote there must not be a hint of sexual immorality among the brethern. Porn is sexually immoral material. THough the original poster should not let blame destroy his faith in the unconditional love of Jesus, he hurt his wife by his actions. There is healthy and appropriate shame and unhealthy shame. Healthy shame cause us to not feel condemned and to take actions to change.
Paul wrote there must not be a hint of sexual immorality among the brethern. Porn is sexually immoral material. THough the original poster should not let blame destroy his faith in the unconditional love of Jesus, he hurt his wife by his actions. There is healthy and appropriate shame and unhealthy shame. Healthy shame cause us to not feel condemned and to take actions to change.
Wil Dizzle Chizzle wrote on June 26th 08 at 02:40AM
sorry jason,
You may be a believer in our Lord but you espouse some ideas that are pretty unbiblical... Sex is great, porn is a perversion of healthy sexuality. Your thinking is twisted. Think I'm wrong? Give a porn and masturbation for a month. See if you control it or it controls you. Now with all that pent up energy go do something POSITIVE with it. No one says you have be desctructive. Feed the poor with that energy. Help some kid in Math. Jesus said do not even look at a woman with lust. If you got problem with that, talk to Jesus about it.
You may be a believer in our Lord but you espouse some ideas that are pretty unbiblical... Sex is great, porn is a perversion of healthy sexuality. Your thinking is twisted. Think I'm wrong? Give a porn and masturbation for a month. See if you control it or it controls you. Now with all that pent up energy go do something POSITIVE with it. No one says you have be desctructive. Feed the poor with that energy. Help some kid in Math. Jesus said do not even look at a woman with lust. If you got problem with that, talk to Jesus about it.
Michael37 wrote on June 26th 08 at 02:45AM
jason fly Let me exhort you. I love you man this is what God has revealed me in his word and i encourage you to read these verses and to memorize them.
It is our nature to be sexual in the sense That we are human, that is true, BUT and thats a BIG BUT God wants us to use save that sex drive For our spouse And that spouse only. are you saying that masterbating isn't a form of sex? what are you thinking about when you are doing it? If you think about a female anytime you do it, you are commiting what God calls Imorality. God said that this wisdom that you are talking about ( jason fly ) is Sensual, earthly and DEMONIC read it in James 3:15, God also said In James 4:4 that being friends with the world is making yourself in enemy of God. God tells us in 1 Thes. 4:3 that the will of God is for our purification, that we Abstain sexual immorality. And God said in Gal. 5:16 To walk in the Spirit so that we don't fufill the lust of the flesh and masturbating is definately of the flesh. God wants us to control our sex drives and it only to be used for our relationship with our spouse.
im sharing what God has said in his word and i hated life wth the struggle of masturbation. i was empty inside and i have to ask you. Dont you feel empty? God does not want this in your life it a foot hol Satan has in your life and he wants you to think that it ok to do that stuff, masturbating and going along with what is natural i will be praying for you that God will show you the truth and that God would show you what He wants for you. from Michael
It is our nature to be sexual in the sense That we are human, that is true, BUT and thats a BIG BUT God wants us to use save that sex drive For our spouse And that spouse only. are you saying that masterbating isn't a form of sex? what are you thinking about when you are doing it? If you think about a female anytime you do it, you are commiting what God calls Imorality. God said that this wisdom that you are talking about ( jason fly ) is Sensual, earthly and DEMONIC read it in James 3:15, God also said In James 4:4 that being friends with the world is making yourself in enemy of God. God tells us in 1 Thes. 4:3 that the will of God is for our purification, that we Abstain sexual immorality. And God said in Gal. 5:16 To walk in the Spirit so that we don't fufill the lust of the flesh and masturbating is definately of the flesh. God wants us to control our sex drives and it only to be used for our relationship with our spouse.
im sharing what God has said in his word and i hated life wth the struggle of masturbation. i was empty inside and i have to ask you. Dont you feel empty? God does not want this in your life it a foot hol Satan has in your life and he wants you to think that it ok to do that stuff, masturbating and going along with what is natural i will be praying for you that God will show you the truth and that God would show you what He wants for you. from Michael
jason fly wrote on June 27th 08 at 12:08AM
Michael because you really believe in what you say I respect you .....
Nevertheless I must point out disturbing facts
1- I can't help but notice that the very open-minded webmaster of this website has erased everything I said.... I don't remember having used foul words , been disrespectful to the people on this post .... I just challenged what I deem a piece of nonsense.
If this branch of the church can't stand dialogue and debat then how can they allege convert people? You don't convince people when you just want to give your opinion and you refuse to listen others.
And don't give me something like "this position is offensive" . This is the opposite opinion that's all.Censoring it is just intolerance.
2- I kind of remember that the existence of the Devil is something challenged inside the very church....Because god exists it doesn't mean that the devil exist . It's always the most manipulative and conservative churchman who resort to the devil to handle people.
because for one part you create a symbol of absolute evil which terrorizes the weak (if you do something you belong to the absolute evil blah blah blah) for other part you relieve them of their fear by saying it s the devil who is to blame.
There is a famous expression for this :use the carrot and the stick.... I believe in God , not in the devil .
3- Bible is a general message whose every sentence is not to take for granted . People who play it by the book are always the most close minded , repressive and intolerant : the same goes for islam. You can find some heinous part in the bible . Because it' not only a religious book it's also cultural . And it's an understatement to say that the culture of a 6000 years old civilisation doesn't necessarly fit our civilisation.
There is a general message in the bible . God is love . He has sacrificed his son for us . He has always believed in us in spite of our errors. If everyone turns his back on us he will be there for us . Trust him no matter what happens like Job did , ask him to lend us some strenght when we have a hard time , that's we can do . That is the general message of bible . A message of love that no close-minded church can rival with.
So don't use quote of the bible to back your opinion . Bible give us momentum and a general direction not precise answers. Answer lie in the experience of the real life . The real life who clearly expresses through science and stat datas that masturbation is something perfectly healthy. When religion is inhuman it just becomes another evil.
N.B : please webmaster if you erase again my post have at least some honesty and decence by explaining that you don't like adverse opinion.
Nevertheless I must point out disturbing facts
1- I can't help but notice that the very open-minded webmaster of this website has erased everything I said.... I don't remember having used foul words , been disrespectful to the people on this post .... I just challenged what I deem a piece of nonsense.
If this branch of the church can't stand dialogue and debat then how can they allege convert people? You don't convince people when you just want to give your opinion and you refuse to listen others.
And don't give me something like "this position is offensive" . This is the opposite opinion that's all.Censoring it is just intolerance.
2- I kind of remember that the existence of the Devil is something challenged inside the very church....Because god exists it doesn't mean that the devil exist . It's always the most manipulative and conservative churchman who resort to the devil to handle people.
because for one part you create a symbol of absolute evil which terrorizes the weak (if you do something you belong to the absolute evil blah blah blah) for other part you relieve them of their fear by saying it s the devil who is to blame.
There is a famous expression for this :use the carrot and the stick.... I believe in God , not in the devil .
3- Bible is a general message whose every sentence is not to take for granted . People who play it by the book are always the most close minded , repressive and intolerant : the same goes for islam. You can find some heinous part in the bible . Because it' not only a religious book it's also cultural . And it's an understatement to say that the culture of a 6000 years old civilisation doesn't necessarly fit our civilisation.
There is a general message in the bible . God is love . He has sacrificed his son for us . He has always believed in us in spite of our errors. If everyone turns his back on us he will be there for us . Trust him no matter what happens like Job did , ask him to lend us some strenght when we have a hard time , that's we can do . That is the general message of bible . A message of love that no close-minded church can rival with.
So don't use quote of the bible to back your opinion . Bible give us momentum and a general direction not precise answers. Answer lie in the experience of the real life . The real life who clearly expresses through science and stat datas that masturbation is something perfectly healthy. When religion is inhuman it just becomes another evil.
N.B : please webmaster if you erase again my post have at least some honesty and decence by explaining that you don't like adverse opinion.
X3Team wrote on June 27th 08 at 10:42AM
In answer to jason fly:
- We apologize about the deleted message he refers to in his above post.
- It was deleted by accident.
- We completely agree that "Censoring it is just intolerance." and we never intend to censor anybodies opinions.
- We do not want to censor anybodies views, or inhibit their right to publish them.
- We also want to thank him for assuming our open-mindedness despite evidence to the contrary :-P
Keep up the debate,
X3Team
- We apologize about the deleted message he refers to in his above post.
- It was deleted by accident.
- We completely agree that "Censoring it is just intolerance." and we never intend to censor anybodies opinions.
- We do not want to censor anybodies views, or inhibit their right to publish them.
- We also want to thank him for assuming our open-mindedness despite evidence to the contrary :-P
Keep up the debate,
X3Team
Michael37 wrote on July 2nd 08 at 12:57AM
Jason first off i just want to say that I am 17 years old and i don't mean to disrespect you at all!!! i'm very sorry if I have, please do forgive me. you probably are older than me and i want to respect all of my elders. But anyways. I just need to ask. why do you believe that masturebation is wrong? Because it just seems like it brings more harm to my spiritual walk than good and when i let go of it i felt way better about myself. Plus alot of other people are trying to get off of it also. So I just want to know why you believe masturbation isn't wrong? So i plead.. please explain how it isn't wrong. I want to be more open minded so please do explain. I love you man Michael
