Help Wanted
The first time I saw pornography I was too young to understand what I was seeing. I never though it affected me, but now that I think about it I'm sure it must have. The time I got hooked on porn I was spending the night at my stepfather's apartment, my brother and I were the only two awake in the apartment. My stepfather pays for ALL the cable channels possible so naturally my brother was looking through the channels for a movie to watch even though it was late. He came across the porn channels and put one on. I was in the same room and at first I looked away and was like "that's not right, turn the TV off and go to sleep", but for some reason he WANTED me to see it...it was like the devil was working directly through him, I didn't think that at the time because he was the one who got me to start going to church. But lately he's straying away from God and he seems...lost. But continuing, after that night I slowly was draw into a battle with porn. I always thought my brother was someone I could look to as a sort of person that I wanted to be like when it came to being a Christian. Kind of a goal for me, to be as close to God as he was. But my view has changed since this summer (i went to church camp and i feel renewed in my walk with God) i feel since I've become closer to God and he's straying away from God I need to bring him back to a position so he can help himself to get closer to God. But my struggle with porn is getting in the way of me getting closer to God, and how am I supposed to help others get closer to God if I am straying away... anyway I don't use the internet in the usual sense. I use a program called Limewire and i don't think the programs for blocking and tracking porn use will affect this one so I would very much appreciate it if some one could tell me if there are any ways to keep my songs that I've downloaded from that program while either getting rid of the program or having a way to block my access to porn through the program.
