I'm tired of my mask.

So I'm considered a leader in the youth ministry at my church. I read ahead, I help plan things, I go to a leadership camp, I teach 6th Graders, and I stay after services to clean up. From my youth minister's point of view, I have everything together and I'm right where God wants me to be. The truth is instead of leaning on God for the past two years I've been leaning on porn. Gay, Straight, Lesbian... I've watched it all. My home life isn't nearly as good as I pretend and most of the time when I'm feeling so alone, I'll turn to this disgusting outlet. There are days when I want to throw this computer in the street and watch it get run over time after time. I've admitted my problems to two trusted friends and a college student that I place as my role model. (I'm a junior in high school.) Prayer would be greatly appreciated.

Derek wrote on August 19th 08 at 02:33AM

hey there, keep living strong for Him man. i pray that you'd turn away from all the wrong stuff and live right with God. and that way, you'd be able to serve Him effectively.