Parents, Kids & Porn

One of the recurring themes I hear over and over as I talk with parents who have attended my seminars is “I was so naïve”.  What they’re referring to is their naiveté (a little French lingo) on how easy it is for their kids to access porn on the Internet.  Parents often think that porn is locked away somewhere on the web, and you need a credit card and have to be an adult in order to access it.  That couldn’t be further from the truth.  Your kids can access porn by simply typing in any number or website addresses which are easy to find if your kids know how to do a Google search (and what kid doesn’t?).  These websites will provide your kids with mountains of porn for them to look at and watch.  Yes, I said “watch” because there are tons of free porn website where your kids can watch XXX movies.  I am talking about hard core, nothing left to the imagination type movies.  Parents are shocked at what’s available for their kids to see and watch, for free, on the web.   

Some of you are probably thinking, “My kid would never look at that kind of stuff”.  I’ve had several conversations with parents who thought just that, but came to me for help when they discovered they were wrong.  The statistics are pretty clear.  On the kids side of things 9 out of 10 of them, between the ages of 8 and 16, have viewed porn online.   On the parents side of things 62% of them are unaware that their kids have accessed objectionable websites.  So you have a lot of kids looking at porn and most parents aren’t even aware that it’s happening – they’re naïve. 

I am sure some parents reading this may go to church with their kids and are thinking the statistics above might not apply to them.  Unfortunately 68% of kids at religiously affiliated schools said they had intentionally looked at porn online.  There is no comfort in that statistic.

So what are parents suppose to do about their kids and porn?  How can they stop the tsunami of sexual explicit websites from flooding into their homes and stealing their kids’ innocence?   I’ll answer these questions and many others right here so check back.  And by the way, you’re no longer naïve.

Angel wrote on April 18th 08 at 09:48PM

I think it's awesome that there are places like this to warn parents. I'm a nineteen-year-old girl, and I wish somebody would have told my parents not to be so naive years ago. When I was 17 I admited to my mom that I was addicted to hardcore porn and erotica--after 3 years of struggling with it. My mom said, "I thought you'd never get into porn or erotica because you're a girl, a good Christian, and homeschooled. I thought it was just a guy thing." Well, she was very wrong.

Dee wrote on April 27th 08 at 06:46AM

Finally...someplace where people who are addicted can get help; where parents and spouses of those addicted can get help. God delivered my husband and myself from porn but we have been struggling with two of our sons for years. I have one son, who is on the worship team of our Church who is struggling with this and another son who is trying desperately to find out who he is and where he fits and I need to find a way to help him.

Kevin wrote on April 28th 08 at 12:00PM

@Angel: So right your are. That statistics show that more girls and woman have struggles in this area than were originally thought. Parents need to make sure their diligent in protecting their daughters from Internet dangers just as much as they would their sons.

Kevin Outland wrote on April 28th 08 at 12:08PM

@Dee: Thanks for you honest words. My goal is to help parents get the knowledge and the tools they need to protect their children from Internet dangers. I'll be posting things that can help here on the BLOG so keep an eye out. If you'd be interested in bringing our "Porn & Parents" seminar to your church our school just give us a call. This is a great way to get equipped.

Suricou Raven wrote on May 21st 08 at 04:30AM

"On the kids side of things 9 out of 10 of them, between the ages of 8 and 16, have viewed porn online."

Your statistic is worthless, because it includes accidential one-off exposure - all the children who come across it accidentially, and just close the window due to a lack of interest. That would count as viewing porn, but it doesn't cause any harm or progression. A far more usful statistic would be what percentage of that age range has *sought* porn deliberatly. Do you have that one to hand? Also, for comparison, the percentage that does so on a regular basis.