Relentless

It seems that the enemy is relentless in trying to get us to go back to certain sins. When it comes to lust, satan is right there to suggest lies when I do not even expect it.

I had been addicted to porn from the time when I was in high school to about the time I was in college. This was usually in the format of downloaded videos or pictures on the internet. I learned in high school that masturbation was a normal thing for guys to experience. This shadowed the illusion that it wasn't a problem, but normal to look up pornography.

My hardest time with this was when I had my first girlfriend when I was 18-19. We were pretty big drug users and I slipped away from the Lord more and more with every drug I took and everytime I had sex. I was also still looking at pornography and masturbated when no one was around.

I gave my life to Christ in May of 2006, I had broken up with my first girlfriend and had quit smoking weed and drinking all together. However, it didn't all happen overnight.

I am 22 now and I have been fighting to get rid of this stuff in my life. While I do not look up pornography anymore, there are still a plethora of girls on myspace, and google images. It is so quick to slip up and look at this images and to begin masturbating away. I do not like talking about this, because for one its kinda gross. Just looking up the pictures alone is one thing, but adding it to the action that follows sounds kind of disgusting even more most Christians to here. But hey I have a problem and God's light needs to shine on it.

I downloaded x3 church software and typed in the friends e-mail addresses feeling relieved. But somehow over time, I still look at images of girls on the internet and get my kicks. I know that I am forgived and I shouldn't give into guilt, but I need help not listening to the enemy. If I make that decision to start browsing online, I can't stop or control myself. I just want to deeply get this thoughts out of my head. I know that I am still a man, and that sometimes the hormonal part of me takes over, but I just want to so back not even deal with that part of my life until I get married and can give that over to her purely. Lord, help me!

You can find help for your sex addiction now at xxx church. You don’t have to live your life addicted to porn.

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