I can remember the first time I was exposed to porn. I was probably around 7 or 8 years old. I really don’t remember. But I had gotten a hold of my grandfather’s magazine. I can still remember in relative detail the picture, somewhere around 20 years later.
I was again exposed in high school, then again in college. The addiction really took root in college. I was a Theology student. I battled it for about 6 years before I told my wife. We had been married for 2 years when I told her. Then for another 3 and a half years or so after that.
I once heard it said that it is easier to quit doing drugs that require a needle then it is to quit smoking. Pornography was like that for me. It is an addiction that is not easy overcome. I’ve been addicted to both caffeine and video games and I quit both of those cold turkey at the same time. (I don’t suggest quitting caffeine and video games cold turkey, by the way. I wound up in the emergency room from withdrawals).
I began to go longer between my times of yielding to the temptation of looking at porn. I was teaching a Sabbath School class at a church I used to go to and I think that helped. Being in ministry, albeit only once a week, helped to keep my eyes on Jesus. And that’s key. If we don’t keep our eyes on Jesus, we’ll fail every time.
I first discovered XXXchurch when I was in college. It was in the Theology building that I saw something posted on the wall that was about this ministry. So I installed x3watch at some point. But I wasn’t serious about overcoming the addiction so I would just keep going back to it anyway.
I began to write for the XXXchurch men’s blog last year. It’s hard to say, but I even fell to temptation after I started blogging for XXXChurch. But my wife told me about a book that she heard mentioned in a sermon called Hitchhiking for Love that she listened to by Pastor David Asscherick. The book is called Porn Again Christian by Pastor Mark Driscoll. (It is a free e-book so no need to worry about paying for it). It is a hard hitting book. He’s frank. He doesn’t sugar coat anything.
God used my wife to help get me through this addiction. I still struggle with temptation. It’s not something that can be overcome easily. But even though temptation is there, we don’t have to give into it.
XXXChurch is a great ministry that helps people overcome this addiction. Download x3watch and get accountability partners. (Get x3watch pro here or x3watch free here). There are other resources that can help as well. (http://www.hopeforone.com/psa/ which also has an iPhone app here; the Pure Passion app available for android or iPhone). But don’t stop there.
Get to know God. He’s the only one who can get you out of this. There are many promises in the Bible that God wants us to claim. Jesus said in John 6:37, “the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out.” So go to Him. Like the prodigal son in the parable in Luke 15 (starting at verse 11), when you take that first step toward God in true repentance, God will run to you and embrace you. Don’t give up.