<?xml version="1.0" encoding="ISO-8859-1" ?>
<rss version="2.0">
	<channel>
		<title>The Industry - XXXChurch.com</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/</link>
		<description>#1 Christian Porn Site</description>
		<language>en-us</language>
		<lastBuildDate>Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:50:02 -0500</lastBuildDate>
		<copyright>Copyright: (C) 2009 XXXChurch.com</copyright>

		<item>
		<title>A MESSAGE FROM A FORMER MODEL</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/amessagefromaformermodel.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[For some reason, I've been really feeling compelled to contact one of the girls who modeled for me.  I finally tracked her down and had a conversation with her via Yahoo Instant Messenger a few days ago.  Amongst other things, I asked if she'd mind allowing me to interview her for this column.  I promised to keep her anonymous.  Today I received this message from her:   			Donny- Hey, well I've been thinking about our convo the last couple days and i finally went on your myspace to read some of your comments to see if you were truly being honest. I saw the last comment from the guy talking about seeing your pod cast on xxx church and so I decided to watch it. I'm so happy for you and I want to ask for your forgiveness. I was a horrible Christian when I was doing what I was doing. I was not only putting myself in a horrible position but I was putting you in that position too by allowing that to go on. I also wanted to tell you that I've hated you till now. I know it sounds extreme but I blamed you for where I was at. If it hadn't been for you taking those pictures I would still be able to hold my head high. Now I've realized that that was Satan. He was telling me to blame you when all along I should've been blaming myself for everything that was going wrong in my life. I needed someone to blame other than myself. You were it. I'm sorry. Also I forgive you. I forgive you for taking the pictures. It sounds stupid because that was your job and I'm forgiving you for your job but for some reason I feel like I needed to say that. For what it's worth. I would love to do the interview and if you want a testimony on screen I would love to tell my story. You don't have to keep me anonymous. I feel like it makes more of an impact if you can see that person, it's real. But it's up to you, I'm just God's tool. He makes everything good. Thank you Donny. You've helped me more than you know. Please give me a call when you have a chance. Talk to you soon. God Bless -R  I removed the rest of her name because I want her to be very sure she's okay going on record or on camera.  If she's sure about it, I look forward to allowing readers to place a face with yet another story of how porn affects the lives of those involved.  I am also very thankful for her forgiveness.  There will likely be more on this story in the near future...]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/amessagefromaformermodel.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:50:02 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>LADIES HELP WITH A STUDY AND EARN 20 BUCKS TOO</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ladieshelpwithastudyandearn20buckstoo.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Dawn Writes: I am conducting a doctoral dissertation on problematic sexual behavior in women and risk factors. Volunteers are needed to fill out a questionnaire (all multiple-choice and check-off lists) that will take approximately 20 minutes. Please email me at dmopitz@msn.com or call at 631-987-9807 for more information. I can mail the packet to a mailing address you have chosen and you will receive a $20 American Express Gift certificate, as well as the results of the study. Your responses are COMPLETELY CONFIDENTIAL! And there you have it!  If you're a female who has struggled with any form of sexual addiction you can anonymously assist in a study on the topic, AND you'll be paid to do so.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ladieshelpwithastudyandearn20buckstoo.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sun, 06 Jan 2008 15:49:16 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>AN EMAIL I RECEIVED TODAY</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anemailireceivedtoday.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[From the boyfriend of a former model.  He became her boyfriend after she had worked for me.  This model keeps in touch with me from time to time. My name is (Name removed) you don't know me but my wonderful girlfriend had worked for you. Her name is (Name removed). When i heard she did a couple photoshoots with you it was probably the one thing that made me wonder if I could truly love her. I blamed you. I have since realized that I love that amazing girl no matter what. We have been together for a year. We have our own place together and couldn't be happier. I had asked her why she still talked to you and what she said made a lot of sense.  "I have to learn to forgive myself and I want Donny to know I don't blame him, he is probably doing enough of that on his own."  I know a little about you from what she has told me and from the porn sunday blog you posted and I just wanted to let you know I think you're doing good . I know it probably dosent mean much coming from someone you have never met but it makes me feel better to let you know. (Name removed) is loved with all my heart and is doing well. I hope life is good and that you are doing well also.  Wishing you the best of luck. -(Name removed)  This email... I don't really know what I think about it.   I can put myself in the place of this man and empathize with how he feels.  This is the first email I've received from the boyfriend of a former model.  I really am glad he contacted me.  Just a month or so ago I had another model  that told me it's hard for her to find a boyfriend. She's an amazingly beautiful girl, but once a new love interest hears about the work she did for me he usually leaves.  For a specific instance, she shared a story about a guy she'd been very interested in for quite some time.  Things were progressing well for her until he learned about the modeling she'd done for me.  As soon as he found out about it, he no longer wanted to date her.  When she talked with her mother about it her mom said she could totally understand how the guy felt and didn't blame him at all.  Both of these situations are examples of how porn affects the lives of those involved long after their "career" is over.  Here's my response to the email above:  (Name removed),  I am glad you contacted me.  I really don't know what to say.  I was a very selfish person, making money at the expense of other people for so long.  I never took the time to consider how it would affect the models for the rest of their lives.  I always justified my actions by saying "I warned them and they signed a release."  The truth is that I knew better.  I had a bigger perspective.  I chose myself over each and every model who worked for me.  I'm so glad you looked beyond the work (Name removed) did for me.  She's a really great girl who needs a good man in her life.  She was young and naive, and I'm glad you don't hold that against her.  I have no excuse, but thank God things have changed.  As you know, I no longer produce porn.  I now travel the country in an attempt to educate people about the realities of that industry.  I don't want to take away anyone's rights to work in the business, consume porn, or produce it.  But I do want people to realize there are real life consequences.  For what it's worth: to you, as well as to her, I apologize.  I wish the two of you nothing but the best.  They say "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger".  I don't think that's just a cliché.  For (Name removed), and for me, I think it's very true.  Feel free to email me any time.  - Donny -]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anemailireceivedtoday.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sun, 06 Jan 2008 01:16:14 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>A BLAST FROM THE PAST</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ablastfromthepast.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[I've been doing a bit of writing.  Not one to be mysterious, I'll flat out tell you what I'm up to:  I've begun the process of writing a book.  Today I was browsing through the blog I used to write while producing porn.  It still exists, I just have it password protected.  While browsing I stumbled across a blog entry from January 5th, 2006.  It was titled "Jesus Loves Porn Stars".  I thought you might find it interesting to read something written by the "old" Donny, particularly because it embodies some of the thoughts I had at the time about XXXChurch.  Here's what I wrote (just so you know, I didn't edit the language I used):  Awhile back the Christian anti-porn website xxxchurch.com interviewed me.  Many Christian types have said xxxchurch.com is itself a little too close to porn to be doing "God's work". I can definitely see how that point of view could be formed.  The founders of the site claim God told them to try to save those of us in the porn industry and to help men who are "addicted to porn".  Supposedly God did this by whispering the simple word "porn" into their ears one day.  Most men, when those voices in their head start bringing porn to mind, will simply jack off and be done with it.  But these guys couldn't face the fact that a personal relationship with "Santa Claus For Adults" (aka Jesus Christ or God) didn't relieve them of the male obsession with sex.  They decided the voices were telling them to start attending porn conventions.  Perhaps this would help ease the guilt they have for finding porn attractive?  At least in their minds they could feel better attending porn conventions if they're telling the believers back home that God wants them there, and not only does he want them there but he wants other Christians to donate money to pay for them to be there.  Great racket! :)  So today I am walking the halls of the AVN show, meeting various pornstars such as Ron Jeremy and shaking the hands of friends, when what to my wondering eyes should appear but a gigantic penis called "Wally the Weiner".  This thing must have been 25 to 30 feet tall.  It stood erect over the entire area.  And the balls were clearly made out down below.  The slogan beside this gigantic cock said something like "Do you have the balls to stop looking at porn".  That big yellow chart you see at the bottom right of that photo was a board where people were supposed to sign their name if they'd vow to stop looking at porn for 7 days.  At the time I was there it looked like 31 people had signed.  Anyway.. Wally the Weiner turned out to be an attraction to a booth for XXXChurch.com.  It was located right beside the booth for hardcore bondage site producer Cybernet Entertainment, who run sites such as (edited out) and (edited out).  I found that mildly amusing for some reason.  Now, I personally don't believe these two men are doing any good whatsoever.  Those who take one of their New Testaments or sign their yellow board will likely change nothing about their daily lives, but what they ARE accomplishing is exposing the Christian girls who came with them to give out Jesus Loves Porn Stars shirts to unbelievable amounts of porn.  If those girls have led sheltered lives up to this point I'm sure they're almost overwhelmed at the moment.  Every day when they come to their booth they must pass dozens of other booths with large flat screen TVs playing just about any type of porn you can imagine at nearly rock-concert volumes.  I'm sure these people are "prayed up" when they enter the showroom floor but you can bet the videos they're seeing on a daily basis are going to stick with them for some time to come.  And it's not like they can avoid it because one would have to close their eyes and plug their ears not to see it all.  I asked the staff members how they're being received by members of the porn community.  The answer is that they're being very well accepted by almost everyone who comes in contact with them.  I pointed out how ironic it is that the adult industry is so much more accepting of them than Christians are of us "sinners".  They had to agree.  Belinda took one of the Jesus Loves Porn Stars shirts.  She said she'll wear it during our next photo shoot.  AND HERE'S ANOTHER ENTRY FROM MY OLD BLOG.  This was dated March 6th, 2005.  It reads:  Yes, I'm speaking of Christians again.  The majority of them are hypocrites.  My religious upbringing, combined with my current occupation, brings me into contact with Christians on an almost-daily basis.  It's amazing how many of them ask for free passwords.  I've also had Pastors admit to me that they surf the adult sites when alone in their office.  I don't know why they think this is something that will endear them to me.  These same pastors have gone on to do sermons about the dangers of pornography not long after talking to me.  I know because they've invited me to attend the service.  "Donny, I'm going to do a sermon on pornography this Sunday and I'd love for you to be there."  Sure, buddy, I'll be there.   Would you like me to stand up and give a testimony about our conversation on your surfing habits?  And you don't even want to get me started on those dear saints of the church that think they need to save me from my sins.  I see the look that starts appearing in their eyes when we talk about photographing naked girls.  One of these dear saints visited my office.  The two of us were alone.  He asked me if I'd show him some of my most recent work.  I did, of course.  He then told me that I shouldn't be doing this for a living, "But can you go back to that last image.  I think I know that girl."  None of this is bullshit.  It annoys the crap out of me.  But to be honest with you, it annoys me when ANY male lectures me about what I do for a living.  My statement to them:  If you can honestly tell me that you've never looked at porn than I'll listen to what you have to say.  Otherwise please realize that you contribute to the "demand".  Without that demand, there would be no supply.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ablastfromthepast.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Thu, 15 Nov 2007 02:45:40 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>BURNING ANGER... BITTERNESS... HATRED...</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/burningangerbitternesshatred.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[If you've heard my story, you've undoubtedly heard me speak about the anger, bitterness and hatred I once harbored towards Christians.  It was pretty bad, let me tell ya.  For many years, I did all I could to cause as much grief as possible to as many Christians as would talk to me.   I loved to rub in their faces the fact that I was a porn producer, and to use that conversation to progress into theological discussions about parts of the Bible that made no sense to me.  ...like Hosea 13:16 where, supposedly under God's command, unborn babies were ripped from their mothers wombs.  The exact text goes like this: Samaria shall become     desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the     sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with     child shall be ripped up. Where does a thinking person go with a scripture like that?  Christians usually had no response to the venom I'd spit after rambling off that passage,  mostly because that scripture, as others like it, aren't discussed from the pulpit.  It almost seems as if words streaming from a pulpit are as far as the average Christian "studies".  I used to refer to such individuals as little birdies sitting with their mouths open waiting for "mommy birdie" to fill them up.  In this case "mommy birdie" was their religious leader.  If their Pastor or Sunday School teacher hadn't prepared them to answer such questions, hadn't told them what to think about such matters, they were not prepared for my rehearsed venomous rhetoric.  I'd pepper the person with whom I was arguing with questions about Dionysus and other "gods" like him.  Dionysus lived 500 years before Christ, was said to have been born of a virgin on December 25th, performed miracles, was called the "King of Kings", the "Alpha and Omega" and was resurrected from the dead after he died.  Mithra, who was popular in Persia 1200 years before Christ, was said to have been born of a virgin on December 25th, had 12 disciples, performed miracles, died and rose again 3 days later.   Christianity, I argued, was not unique and was in fact a copy of previous belief systems.  For these arguments most Christians have no answers.   Like their ignorance of the text of Hosea 13:16, many people have never heard of Dionysus or Mithra. Since surrendering my life to God I've discovered there are answers to these questions.  I've been searching them out.   But we're not here to talk about those answers right now.  If you'd like great scholastic research on such things pick up a copy of Lee Strobel's The Case for the Real Jesus (which is an entirely different book than The Case for Christ).  It relies on researched scholarship to address these claims.  Very good book.  I highly recommend it. The anger, bitterness and hatred I harbored was mostly based on experiences I had growing up a Pastor's son, watching the hypocrisy and politics that went on amongst leaders and members of the congregations my father pastored.   If that was God, I reasoned, I wanted no part of Him.  But the nature of God and the nature of those who claim to follow Him are often mutually exclusive, aren't they?  I didn't allow for that.  Such an elementary concept didn't occur to me until late in my porn career.  Childhood experiences were only part of my problem.  I was deeply disappointed that the entire belief system I'd been taught since childhood had been reduced to so much bullshit, at least in my mind (pardon the language, dear constant reader...  I'm certain God has heard it before).  Switching that disappointment to intense anger was a very short road.  The amazing year since I surrendered my life to God and have pursued to strengthen my relationship with Him has been quite the learning experience, to say the least.  My mind has been rewired in many ways.  Circuits have been replaced.  Traffic has been re-routed.  You get the picture, I'm sure.  In a real, living, non-cliché way I've discovered that God really is love.  Pure love.   He's this perfect parent who wants nothing but good for His children.  Ya know what I mean, Vern?  That learning process continues.  I love Him more each day.  On a daily basis, I discover something new about his nature from my experiences in... ordinary life.  Letting go of all the anger and bitterness is part of the process of getting to know who God IS.    I'm happy to say, those two things are mostly gone.  Mostly.  There are flare ups from time to time, and perhaps there always will be.  But the hatred?  I can honestly say the hatred is gone for good.  How was I able to let that hatred go?  By making an attempt to see others as God sees them... as he sees me.  Despite my garbage, baggage, sin... God loved me.  He never let go.  He looks at me with even more fondness than I look at my son.  I know there is nothing my son could ever do to make me love him any less, and how much more so can the same be said about how God cares for each of HIS children?  I've said before, if someone disliked my son I think I'd have a hard time liking that person.  How can I dislike God's sons and daughters and expect Him to be happy about it?  I've discovered that letting go of hatred is mostly a choice.  I've made that choice.  I've adjusted the perspective from which I look at others, and have happily discovered I really love people.  ----------------  I like watching people.  I like studying them.   In doing so, I've been really encouraged by the movements I see happening amongst Christian communities all across this country.  I see hypocrisy and judgmental attitudes being addressed from the pulpit, and I notice that when people realize they don't HAVE to be that way, when they are "given permission" to lay such things down by someone they trust and respect, all that crap is gladly abandoned.  Even though it's self evident, it's as if we sometimes need to have someone tell us "that's okay".  I think to myself, "Perhaps all that crap has existed in this world for so long only because people assume they HAVE to be that way.  Perhaps such behavior has been handed down from one generation to another, and when people find out it's okay to break that cycle it's like a burden is lifted from their shoulders and they are free to love everyone, regardless of where they are... it sure seems as if things are changing for the better.  It sure seems as if people are finally starting to discover what freedom in Christ really means.  It sure seems as if Christians are beginning to realize they really CAN try to follow the example Jesus set with his life."  Or maybe, just maybe, it was my eyes that were out of focus all along?  ----------------  How can I do anything but love God's kids?]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/burningangerbitternesshatred.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2007 17:09:30 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>AN EMAIL I RECEIVED THIS MORNING</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anemailireceivedthismorning.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Hey Donny,  I have a HUGE problem. I'm getting married in a month, and my fiancé FOUND MY PICTURES on the internet. He is beside himself. He is hurt and shocked and being that we are supposed to tie the knot in less than a month, I'm freakin suicidal!!! Freakin sick over this....throwing up, cannot sleep at all...I never thought in a million years that would ever happen. How long do those pictures circulate?? I am seriously pissed.  I know I did those pics and yes it was my fault, I want to get them OFF the internet. Is there anyway possible to do that ASAP? I will pay you the money back, whatever it takes. This will and is ruining my life. I am fearful that his friends will see and torture him about it, or the people I work with in the military. (they are all men) I am absolutely SICK over this. I can't eat or sleep and I honestly don't know what to do. I swear to you, I never thought this would happen. I mean, there are a million girls on the freakin internet....why me?! and because you are supposed to be a changed man? into God and everything? please...I need to know that you understand my situation, and find it in your heart to help me. This is destroying me. I know I am 100% responsible for taking the pictures, it's my fault. But it was a long time ago, and I was single and I needed the money. But isn't there anything you can do to please help me now??? This was like 2 or 3 years ago? Why are my pics still on the damned internet???  My military career and soon to be marriage (if he still will) is riding on this. Don't my pictures expire after a certain time? and you just put new ones up? or sell new ones to companies to flush out old girls? I think you can read the desperation in this email.  I am completely desperate (again) at this point Donny and need your help. Can you help me? Please. I need EVERYTHING removed. What can we do? I'll pay you money, anything. PLEASE say you can help me. PLEASE.    Yep, porn is harmless...]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anemailireceivedthismorning.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sun, 23 Sep 2007 12:56:07 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>PERSONAL COSTS OF PORN</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/personalcostsofporn.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Wendy, my ex-wife, and I are pretty good friends.  We were high school sweethearts.  We dated 4 years and were married 6 years.   During 3 of those married years I produced porn behind her back:  first on a part time basis, later full time.  After our divorce, Wendy and I maintained a unique relationship.  Our son deserved parents who got along.  Who cooperated with each other.  Who loved him despite their differences, and who demonstrated that love, in part, by keeping their personal disagreements out of his life as much as possible.  That's what he received.  Now, as a Christian, everyone talks about the two of us reuniting.  "Wouldn't that be the ultimate display of God's healing power?" they ask.  Or some similar question that means pretty much the same thing.  I can't say the two of us haven't discussed it, but I can say that at this point such a reunion doesn't look very promising.  We're friends. Best friends.  But there's a lot of... baggage between us, you might say.  Some very painful experiences.  Some very bad memories.  Wendy has accepted my apologies.  She's forgiven me.  She's an amazing woman.  Forgiveness and re-committing one's entire life to the person who caused so much hurt... well, those are two completely different animals.  Sometimes she has an issue with this blog and with my speaking engagements.    Oftentimes she has "issues" with me over a variety of other topics.  There's a lot to work through.  When she recently asked me why I don't focus more on what porn cost us while blogging or speaking I asked her if she's actually read everything I've written or listened to all that has been spoken.  Admittedly, she doesn't read a good portion of what I write.   It's easy to understand why.  A lot of the topics written about here are still a raw wound in Wendy's life.  She definitely didn't deserve what I put her through.  Tonight I'm writing a bit more about the personal costs.  I'm going to rip myself open for this one.  Straight, blunt talk.  To start, I'll have to share more of the details of my past.  Only by doing so can I paint the picture of what my lifestyle choices have cost.  --  Like most males, I had a personal interest in porn.  I preferred to look at solo models.  Hardcore sex content didn't really interest me. The visuals that "got me going" didn't involve other men molesting the fantasy women I viewed.  My first adult magazine was one left in a park where a friend and I played.  I was in grade school.  The images intrigued me.  The corny words beneath them are still in my mind to this day.  I can literally tell you what was written beneath my favorite images.  I also remember buying magazines from a liquor store near my home when I was in the 10th grade.  The clerk had to have known I wasn't 18, but he sold them to me anyway.  Still, my interest in porn was an off-again, on-again thing.  It hadn't consumed me.  Yet.  What really got me was when I was showed photos of a woman I knew.  The photographer, her husband, had no evil intentions.  He was just proud of his wife. What happened in my mind is almost indescribable.  Not only was it a turn on to see someone I knew so exposed, I started thinking that I could have one helluva good time picking up the camera and pointing it at willing models of my own.   I'd never considered photographing a nude female before that time, but afterwards it is something I wanted to do very much.  I found a private party willing to part with cash for photos.  I also did a bit of research and found companies willing to buy.  At first, I photographed a few girls I knew.  It wasn't hard.  I can't describe it, but there's something intriguing to many woman about being photographed nude.  With less money than you might imagine, it was easy to change "Yeah it might be fun to pose naked but I'd never actually do it" into "Yeah, I'll do that... I've always wanted to pose nude."  I'm a smooth talker when I want to be.  That definitely helped.  In my own home, I once photographed a girl who had been a High School classmate. Wendy was at work.  To show off, I emailed some of the photos to an acquaintance I'd met on an instant messaging program.  He sent a few of the photos back to Wendy.  That almost ended in divorce.  She didn't believe me when I told her I wasn't sleeping with the girl.  She didn't believe I'd done it for money (and even if she had believed the money part, her feelings on the matter wouldn't have been much different).  We got over it as best we could.  She assumed I wouldn't do such a thing again.  I didn't want to hurt her, but I didn't want to give up the thrill of making money by photographing naked women.   I decided I'd just have to work harder at hiding my "work".  And honestly, at that point the money wasn't the major motivator.  I was addicted to the rush of having models expose themselves to me.   I was addicted to producing pornography. Later the thrill would subside and I'd be motivated to "go big" by the desire for money and the desire to throw my actions into the faces of the religious hypocrites I'd been around each church service, all of my life. I was caught again when I forgot to erase photos off the card of our digital camera.  Earlier that day I'd done a "test shoot" of a model so that I could email her photos to a client for approval.  When Wendy saw them I convinced her they were pics my friend John had found online, and that I'd had him transfer them to my compact flash card so I could look at them later.   A few rocky days later and we'd moved on.  I kept shooting models behind her back.  A day came when I slept with one of them after a shoot.  I hated myself for it.  I decided to hide my actions from Wendy but promised myself that if I ever did such a thing again I was going to come clean.  While Wendy was pregnant I continued shooting models.  With a baby on the way, you'd think that if there was any decency left inside of me I'd stop what I was doing.  I didn't.  I congratulated myself that I hadn't slept with other models.  I congratulated myself for "keeping it professional".  When Caden was a newborn I started my first porn sites.  While on a business trip to Los Angeles I was called by a model who'd worked for me a few weeks prior.  She was also in Los Angeles and wanted a ride home.  We spent the night together in a hotel along the way.  A few weeks later I kept the promise I'd made to myself:  I told Wendy the truth about my "work" while on another business trip to Phoenix.  That was it.  I never again spent the night in the  home we'd made together.  ---  In my case, what did my "porn life" cost?  My self respect? Surely.  A great wife?  Absolutely.  What else did it cost?  I'll share some of what I know, but there are many "costs" that I do not even comprehend myself.  It cost my son, the most important person in the world to me, the chance at having his mom and dad at home when he arrives from school.  It cost him the chance to witness what relationships are supposed to be like.  To witness how a man should love his wife.  To witness how two people who love each other should learn to bend and give and compromise.  I don't have the chance to help Caden with his homework as I'd like to do, because I'm not usually there when he comes home from school.  My decisions took that opportunity away.  It cost Wendy intense personal anguish.  One day she had a husband she loved,  the next she was living in the house we shared with only her infant son to keep her company.  I can't imagine how crushing that must have been.  I can't imagine the gut wrenching anguish and tears she must have experienced.  Just a few months later, when I'd started dating Belinda and was "living it up" as a man who was all of a sudden able to freely, openly produce pornography, I can't imagine how horrible it must have been for an innocent mother to watch me drive away with our baby boy in the car and another woman in the passenger seat.  She once told me she was unable to watch a romance movie for 2 years after our separation. The only way I can cope with this stuff, by the way, is to realize that the wretched man who did all of these things has been forgiven and given the chance to start with a clean slate.  THANK GOD FOR HIS GRACE.  And thank Wendy for hers, as well. Wendy wasn't the only one affected.  Her entire family grieved with her.  Her entire family was thrown for a loop, wondering how something like this could happen to someone who definitely didn't deserve it.  Wendy's little brother, with whom I'd been very close since he was an infant, all of a sudden lost a loving Uncle.  Amongst my friends and family, many lives were thrown into turmoil by my actions. The fallout affected others more than you might imagine... more than I might imagine... more than I'll ever fully comprehend.  ---  If I were to stick my finger in a light socket, the resulting shock would not be a punishment.  That shock would be a result of my free will to make a bad decision.   Cause and Effect.  If you were passing by me when I had my finger in that socket, and I grabbed you, the shock you'd receive wouldn't be punishment either.  You'd be affected by MY free will... by MY bad decision.  You, as an innocent bystander, would experience pain because of the actions of another.   Again, Cause and Effect.  And so it goes in lives all over the world.  Innocent children are killed because of the free will actions of their parents or some complete stranger.  Innocent husbands are torn apart because of the free will of their wives, who have affairs.  Innocent wives are hurt because of the free will actions of their husbands, who can't control the impulse to consume pornography.  I realize there are some who make the claim that pornography can enrich the sex lives of couples who consume it.  I am not going to debate that particular issue at this time.  But what I will say is that there are many wives who are NOT OKAY with their husbands consuming pornography.  It doesn't matter if the husband thinks there is no harm in it:  if his wife has a problem with it, he shouldn't do it, pure and simple (I'm not going to get into the moral reasons to stay away from porn at the moment, either).  When we were married, Wendy used to be "hurt" by several things. I used to think some of the things that hurt her feelings were ridiculous. I'd get upset that I had to walk on eggshells and watch what I said out of fear that she might be hurt.  As I age and experience life, I have begun realizing that she had a right to be herself. She shouldn't have been expected to change for me. I either needed to make myself compatible with her, or choose not to be with her, or she could choose not to be with me.  Regardless of  a person's moral beliefs, this same concept applies when we start talking about whether or not pornography hurts marriages. The fact of the matter is that many women are indeed hurt (yes, even outside the spiritual arena) when they find out their husbands consume pornography. You, my constant reader, may personally believe it's ridiculous to feel that way, but the fact is, it DOES hurt, for whatever the reason may be.  In such a case, a husband needs to stop watching porn. He needs to respect his wife's feelings.  He made a commitment to her, after all, for better or worse.  He needs to stop hurting the innocent with his free will decisions.  My personal attraction to porn led down a path that ended up costing everything that should have been valuable to me.  I was too daft, too bitter, too selfish to see what really mattered in life.  The same can be said for those who allow pornography to control them, or who have chosen to produce it without regard for the lives of those involved, or those who have chosen to act in it, or...  Thank God that Jesus Christ can and will set those free who want to be set free.  I am glad I accepted that freedom.  I may never recover all that was lost, but I have already recovered so much.  If you're struggling, reach out for help.  It's there for the taking.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/personalcostsofporn.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Sep 2007 01:43:50 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>DONNY DO SOME PEOPLE ENJOY BEING IN PORN?</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/donnydosomepeopleenjoybeinginporn.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[I recently received the following letter: Hi Donny,  I've got a question that is always going around in my head whenever I read stories like the one that you posted: "Porn is harmless, right". I've had a porn addiction and I think it will never quite go away (similar to alcoholism). I think for the rest of my life I will have to deal with it in my mind and resist the temptation time and time again.  My question now though, that I'm pretty sure that many other people excuse their addiction (and so did I), what happens to the people that enjoy the business? I've never seen your side of the story, but I always thought that there actually are people that are not hurt by the industry and enjoy it. Just pictures on a regular basis, nothing more. I've have a friend and she has no problem telling me that she used to do "webcam"  striptease. She's totally fine with that, confident of her body, I believe her family knows about it. What about those people?  I understand it's still hurtful for another person (guys like me) to look at her, that commit adultery with it. But I can think it probably is a very common excuse to still keep on looking at pictures?  I feel a little guilty writing this much and taking so much of your time. I hope you understand. One more thing. You had to deal with your mess with your wife and it's probably very obvious to her that your history has stirred up great hurt, and you can therefor work on it actively. My relationship with my wife Carolyn has had ups and downs and I think a lot of the downs have been caused by my past addiction to porn. I've outed myself to Carolyn in the past, but I don't think she understands that some of the trouble and fights that we have, might have been caused by my corrupted past. What kind of advice can you give?  Best Regards,  Hans-Jörn Eich Instead of being "religiously correct", I'm going to answer this question with the real truth of the matter.  This man makes a good point, doesn't he?  For a group of people who are working to raise awareness of the dangers of pornography, this is a tough question, isn't it?  Or at least APPEARS to be a tough question.  Is it possible there are people out there who (gasp) LIKE working in the porn industry?  Of course it is.  For a very long time, I was one of them.  I could give you some cliché line about how lots of people enjoy things that are bad for them, but that wouldn't be "being true to myself", as I promised my dad when I became a Christian.  Instead, I'm just going to tell you, "Yes, there are people who like to do porn".  I can also tell you that over time it wears on most of them.   It becomes unfulfilling.  I say this based strictly on the lives of people with whom I associated over the years.  This is not a scientific survey.  I can confidently say that the sex business wears on a person over time.  What you once looked forward to, over time becomes a drudgery.  Sure, the same can be said for any job.  But who wants sex to become a "job"?  And that, my friends, is what it eventually becomes when you're making your living having sex on screen.  On this journey I've been experiencing since becoming a Christian almost a year ago, I've been digging deeper into the reasons WHY God asks us to follow certain "rules".  See, I'm not one who enjoys being told what to do.  If, however, I understand the reasons behind the things I'm asked to do I accept it a bit better.  One area of contemplation is premarital sex.  This seems like a great column in which to delve into that topic, don't you think?  To illustrate my point I'll once again refer to my relationship with my 7 year old son.  Caden, like most children his age, loves candy.  If it was up to him he'd eat it all day long, every day.  As his parents, his mother and I must severely limit his intake.  The reasons are self-explanatory. Caden, however, may not yet fully comprehend why he can't eat as much candy as he'd like.  Perhaps when we tell him "no" he thinks we're being a bit mean to him.  He may not understand what the big deal is about eating all that sugary goodness.  "It tastes SO good, mom and dad.  Why can't I have it?" Someday, however, he'll fully comprehend the reasons behind our "no's".   He'll understand how much damage a diet of candy would have wreaked on his overall health.  And so I return to the topic of premarital sex.  This is a concept that many readers have likely grasped years ago.  I'm a bit slow to understand some of life's basics.  One of the reasons, I've found, that God asks us to refrain is NOT because he'll "send us to hell" if we don't.  He's simply looking at us with the same love and concern that we all have for our own children, looking down the road to our futures.  Wouldn't it be much more romantic if we can tell our spouse, on the night of our wedding, that he or she is the only person we've ever been with?  Don't you think there would be a lot less friction in our relationships if our significant others didn't have to wonder whether they match up to our previous encounters?  Wouldn't it be nicer if they didn't have to "compete" with the memories from our past?  And wouldn't we have a lot less pain in our lives if we didn't have to carry around the emotional baggage of our past intimate relationships? If we could tell our significant other that we fight our desires to view pornography because we want to remain pure for the long-term health of our relationship, what would that do for our private sex lives?  I can only answer those questions for myself, but I'm sure anyone who answers them honestly would come to similar conclusions:  Had I followed God's "plan" for sex my life sure would be easier.  And that, my friends, is really what it's all about:  God wanting the very best for all of us.  He's not trying to be mean by not letting us eat that delicious candy, he just doesn't want our teeth to rot and fall out. Know what I mean?  I had a lot of fun in porn.  For a season.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/donnydosomepeopleenjoybeinginporn.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Aug 2007 12:18:11 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>PORN IS HARMLESS RIGHT?</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/pornisharmlessright.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Last night I was sitting at my computer alone in my room.  I decided to click on iTunes and listen to some music.  My iCal is directly beside the icon for iTunes and I accidentally clicked it instead.  I haven't opened it for a long time.  Since I was producing porn, to be exact.   I now use Google Calendar instead.  In iCal I have a "to do's" list.  On that list is a "Model Callback List" where I used to write the name and number of all of the girls who'd call my newpaper ads.  I'd also write down the names and numbers of referrals as well.  There are literally hundreds of names on this list.  I started scrolling through it.  A few of them popped out at me.  I decided to type their names into MySpace search and see if I could find a profile for them.  These particular names are girls with whom I had a pretty good rapport,  almost a friendship, when they were working with me.  I decided to tell them what's happened in my life.  I wanted to apologize to them for getting them involved in the adult business, regardless of whether or not they were upset about being involved.  It just seems like the right thing to do.  The name of a model from more than 5 years ago popped up.  She had a MySpace profile.  I sent her a message and requested an add to her friends list.  I wanted my first message to be light hearted and simple.  And short.  I'd apologize later.  I wrote:  Hey _______ ... How are ya?   This morning I woke up.  Here was her reply (click here for the screenshot): Hello Donny,  I'm sorry, but I can't be your friend. People found out about the pictures I did and I came really close to killing myself over it. I need to forget about it and move on. That does not mean I blame you or anything, but that does mean I have to cut ties involving it, and that does involve you. You're more than welcome to write me, etc...I just can't have you on my friends list. I'm very sorry and hope you understand.  Thanks, _____ All this girl did was pose for nude photos.  She didn't have sex with another person.  She posed.  For photos.  Earlier today I posted a very short version of this story on my personal blog.  I then posted a myspace bulletin to invite some of those on my friend's list to read it.  That resulted in a discussion between me and an acquaintance of mine who used to hang out with me when I did work for Playboy.  This girl asked: When you look at this story, what contributed more to her nearly suicidal depression? The nude pictures she posed for or the judgmental assholes (her supposed freinds) who made her feel like less than dirt for doing it? I have not spoken to this model to ask what made her want to kill herself.  There are lots of possible scenarios, too numerous to think of. ----------  Let's imagine one (this is based on something that really DID happen with another girl who modeled for me):  A girl is very close to her father. A pure daddy's girl. She's the apple of his eye. He dotes on her all her life. She goes to college and he's proud as can be. He's busting his buttons.  She meets a guy named Donny who offers her more money for a few hours work than she can make in 2 weeks at Starbucks, working lots and lots of hours. After thinking about it for several days, she goes for it.  Weeks later she's home visiting her father. Something's wrong but she doesn't know what it might be. She can't put a finger on it.  Daddy says nothing.  What she doesn't know is that one evening after daddy had put in a hard day of overtime, trying to make more money to pay for his baby's schooling, he was ready to go home and relax in front of the TV with a cold beer in hand.  But first he has to give his good friend a ride home.  He and his buddy are walking to the car  and he notices something under the windshield wiper, left there by some anonymous person. He has no idea what it is, but he's curious.  As he picks it up, with his buddy looking over his shoulder, he realizes it's his little girl. His amazing daughter.  Smiling and wearing nothing, with her legs open and a porn site URL branded in between them.  He's humiliated and his heart is broken, but he loves her and doesn't want to tell her about it. He decides to let it pass, but he's not a very good actor and his little girl knows something's wrong.  She asks her mom. Her mom tells her about the anonymous "gift".  She feels so much shame. She let her father down.  She embarassed him in front of his friend, and who knows who else?  After all, nobody's come forward to claim laying the photo on his windshield. For all she knows, her whole hometown has seen those photos.  It hurts her even worse to realize that he's killing himself inside not wanting to talk to her about it.  She knows he's only doing so because he doesn't want to embarrass her by making her look him in the eye if he were to confront her with it.  He has no idea that she is aware of what happened.  Her heart breaks every time she sees him trying to pretend everything is okay.  She wants to die.  How could she have disappointed him like this?  ----------  I'm not saying that's what's happened in this case.  But it has happened to models I've worked with.  That, and worse (one girl even had the "honor" of her nudes posted on trees at the school she attended).  And this isn't the only model that's contemplated suicide.  One former model of mine actually attempted it.  I was still in the industry and shrugged it off when someone told me about it.  I figured, as did my MySpace messaging friend, that it was the problem of those in her life who are way too judgmental.  It wasn't MY problem.  But how long can an honest person keep that attitude?  Seriously, now.  To the message sent to me by this model, I replied: ...I realize how much I was hurting people. I now travel and speak to people all across the country, hoping to make them see the realities of porn. Hoping to make them see that real lives are destroyed by it. Hoping to make them realize that it really isn't something that is just harmless fun. I don't want to take away anyone's rights to consume it by any means, but I want them to see the full picture before they decide to do so. I want them to see that even if they are consumers of porn, they help destroy lives. Like yours. Supply and demand: if there was no demand, you and I wouldn't make money producing the supply. I just wanted to tell you I am sorry. I never told you that. But I really am. I was very ignorant as to how much this hurt people. I thought of myself and my own agendas above you and the other girls we involved. Yes, you made your own choice, as did the others, but I put it out there for you to choose. I really am sorry _____. She read the message but hasn't replied.  I can only hope she accepts my apology.  Who's daughter are you looking at when you're spanking it to porn?  Who's niece?   Did she want to commit suicide after filming the scene you're watching, or the photos you're browsing?  God, I hope not.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/pornisharmlessright.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Jun 2007 22:34:12 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>AN UNFORTUNATE SERIES OF EVENTS</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anunfortunateseriesofevents.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[I'm finally ready to write about it.  I needed time to get my emotions under control so I can write objectively.  The situation wasn't pretty.  If you have no idea what I'm talking about, check out this blog entry from Craig.  There's obviously more to the story.  And as time has gone by I've been learning more of it myself.  Let me ask you a question: Do you remember when you first became curious about the opposite sex?  I remember playing "you show me yours and I'll show you mine" with a girl from my Sunday School class somewhere around kindergarten or first grade.  I told my parents, we had a talk and that was that.  My 7 year old son is now at that age.  He has the same curiosities we've all had growing up.  In Caden's case, he has an amazing mother who would rather err on the side of being overly cautious than to err on the side of not caring enough.  I admire that about her.  My son could not have a better mother.  Wendy wanted to handle this situation appropriately.   She'd spoken with Caden and had "the talk" with him.  I spoke with him as well.  Both of us made the issue light hearted and no big deal.  Wendy wanted to make sure we'd handled it right, so she decided to see a professional counselor.  Based on the recommendations of  a local church, she chose one Barry Byrne from Redding, California.  Mr. Byrne is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and happens to be a member of the church that recommended him.  Upon meeting with Barry, Wendy didn't know where to start, so Barry guided her along and asked her to start at the beginning.  Since Barry is a Christian, Wendy decided to share some of her spiritual concerns with Barry.  One of those concerns relates to the verse in Exodus 34:7 where it's mentioned that the sins of the father are passed along to their children.  She told Barry about my past as a porn producer.  Wendy was wondering if Caden would have to face spiritual battles because of choices that I'd made.  Apparently the two of them weren't communicating very well, because Barry totally didn't grasp the fact that Wendy was asking about possible spiritual issues in my son's future.  She wanted to know Barry's opinions of such issues.  The 45 minute session, apparently, was not enough time for Barry to fully comprehend Wendy's concerns.  In fact, it was such a short session that Wendy never was able to get around to the original issue she'd come to address.  Barry turned me in to Child Protective Services.  He thought my past as a porn producer warranted a check in from CPS to make sure I'd never exposed my son to porn.  I was furious.  In fact, I'd say "furious" is an understatement.  Here's one question I'd like answered: Let's say I was a police officer.  As such, I'd probably witness horribly bloody auto accidents, homicide scenes, and other activities that are not appropriate for 7 year old children to hear about.  As a good parent, I would never come home from work and tell my son about such things, right?  Likewise, as a porn producer, which may be immoral to Mr. Byrne and others who hold Christian values but is definitely far from illegal (especially in California),  I would never expose my son to my work.  Ever.  I'm a very good parent.  I love my son more than words can describe.  I'm overly protective.  I've never once raised my voice to him in his entire life, nor used the phrase "because I said so", because I feel he deserves better.  I don't spank him (instead I get down on my knee at his eye level and explain things to him - and in return he is very well behaved - he behaves out of love, respect and trust rather than out of fear).  Mr. Byrne knew nothing of those things.  He was in a hurry to get to his next appointment and didn't do a thorough job.  As I said before, 45 minutes wasn't even enough time to get to the actual issue Wendy came to address.  CPS questioned my son.  Wendy was just out of sight, yet still able to hear everything that happened.  The person who interviewed Caden was very nice, but I still greatly dislike the fact that my son has now had to hear the question "did your daddy ever show you photos of naked people?" and answer inquiries by some random stranger as to why he wanted to "play doctor" with his playmate.  After the interview, the CPS agent called Wendy outside to let her know that she had no concerns and that, in her opinion, Caden is a very well adjusted child who is very close to his father.  Duh.  Actually speaking with my son himself (or spending a little more than 45 minutes with Wendy) would have revealed that to Barry Byrne and prevented my son from having to go through the CPS interview.  I've since spoken with Mr. Byrne.  His attitude while talking with me took away most of my anger.  He was considerate and apologized that he'd misunderstood Wendy's concerns.  He asked me to try to see that he was just trying to do his job.  He said he'd keep in mind my recommendation "to dig a little deeper" should he face a similar situation in the future.  I kept a civil tone the entire time.  I didn't yell or scream at him.  I didn't curse at him or call him derogatory names.   I mention that, because the old Donny would have done all of that and more.  But I did file a complaint with the family life Pastor who oversees the counseling department at the church, and Wendy followed that with a letter of her own.  The Moral of This Story: Yes, my fine fellow Christians, even [gasp] PORN PRODUCERS (and former porn producers) can be good, responsible parents!]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anunfortunateseriesofevents.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Jun 2007 09:10:17 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>AN UPDATE</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anupdate.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Craig recently blogged about a problem my family has been facing.  By "family", I'm speaking of myself, my son and his mother (who is my ex-wife).  Yesterday marked a resolution of that issue.  It was a good resolution, yet I still can't help but feel a lot of anger burning inside.  Today I meant to write a blog entry telling the full story of what happened.  I figured I'd mellow out overnight and write in the morning.  It's morning.  I'm still steaming.  I want to hold off a bit longer before writing.  Perhaps tonight.  Perhaps in the morning.  I just don't want to let my anger fuel my pen.  I'm a "young" Christian, but that doesn't mean I have to be an irresponsible one.  If I am going to write about this I need to do so without meaning harm to anyone else, know what I mean?  A sincere "thank you" to those who emailed letters of support, sent myspace messages, or posted a comment in encouragement on Craig's article or the XXXChurch myspace page.  I read every one of them.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/anupdate.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Jun 2007 09:49:20 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>SPAM AND THE SPAMMING SPAMMERS WHO SPAM YA</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/spamandthespammingspammerswhospamya.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[I started this blog entry in the very back seat of an airplane at 35,000 feet, where I found myself listening to   Metallica's version of   Turn the Page.  Recently, on an adult industry message board, a former acquaintance posted a message to me to “Turn the Page” and then posted the lyrics to this song.  He'd recently viewed footage of me from a news story on an Indianapolis television station website. On the adult boards, reactions to that clip were expectedly negative.  Like any good tv story, this one was edited to get the very best “story” in the shortest amount of time.  Bits and pieces of a rather long interview were shortened down to just a few minutes of airtime.  Gone was the part where I said, on camera, that I am not taking a stance against pornographers, nor do I want to shut down the porn industry.  I believe in the rights we're afforded in this country.  Those rights extend to every person, regardless of whether or not he/she agrees with Donny Pauling.  It's not my right to dictate what any person can do with their life.  Not even God himself does that.  Were he into legislating rights, we'd still be living in the Garden of Eden, ignorant of many of the things that are now realities of our lives.  My goal, however, is to educate consumers. To tell all sides of the story.  To make it very clear exactly what is being supported when a free porn site is visited or a subscription is purchased or a magazine is taken off the shelves.  That, my friends, is MY right.  And it is my opinion that if those in the porn world are as open minded as they claim, they'll value my rights as much as they treasure their own.    Porn and Pancakes   events are one of the ways in which I've been given the opportunity to help shed light on an issue so many refer to as a “dark world”.  But I'm not here to preach to pornographers.  I write today to dispel yet another myth that seems common place amongst “opponents” of porn.  In my last blog entry I put a human face on those who make their living in the porn world.  This one continues that theme.  Today I want to talk to you about spam.               As a side-note, I'm now sitting at the airport in Grand Rapids, Michigan.  Earlier this morning I had the opportunity to speak in front of more than 400 Pastors and church staff members from across the country.  It was a lot of fun.            Now back to the blog at hand.  Over and over I've heard from various speakers, including XXXChurch co-founder Craig Gross, that “pornographers don't care if you're 9 or if you're 90”.  The point usually being made is that they'll send spam to your box with blatant disregard to what your age might be.  To me, that statement is far too general.  It's kinda like the stereotype that all African Americans like chicken and watermelon: it's simply not true.       While some African Americans do indeed enjoy chicken and watermelon, some do not (this has nothing to do with anything, but I personally love chicken and tolerate watermelon if I have to do so - chicken's very yummy, but watermelon's just a waste of stomach space).  What's my point?  My point, constant readers, is that while it's true some unscrupulous porn bulk emailers do indeed disregard all consideration and send mail without regard, I don't know of any legitimate porn companies that tolerate such practices.  It's just bad business, and as I've mentioned in previous blog entries, most pornographers treat their profession just as any good business person would do. Don't get me wrong  I'm not saying it's impossible that some major porn companies send spam.  There are good people and bad people in every business.      So where does spam come from?      For the most part, spam comes from small operations.  The biggest spammer I personally know operates all by himself, alone.  We'll call him “Dan”, because that's the first name that popped into my head.  I was a bit disappointed when I found out he was a spammer, because I really like Dan.                        I'm now halfway through my flight, currently somewhere between Minnesota and Sacramento.  Exactly where, I do not know.  Because spam is frowned upon within the industry, unless you're a trusted acquaintance you'd never know Dan “mails” (he doesn't refer to what he does as spamming, he prefers the term “mailing”).  I knew him several years before he finally revealed to me what he does.  Is he an uncaring monster?  Not at all.  He's very fun to be around, the life of the party.  The man who makes everyone laugh.  Dan is also very lonely, but that's beside the point.  There's no way that Dan could ever know who is on the receiving end of his emails.  It's not that he “doesn't care if you're 9 or if you're 90”, it's just that it's impossible to tell how old the person is on the receiving end of his mailings.  If, for example, a person has agreed to “opt in” to a porn mailing list, there is no magical way for Dan to know whether or not the subscriber has lied about their age.  Let's also concede that Dan likely purchases mailing lists from someone who may have illegally harvested those email addresses online.  That's entirely possible, but  Dan strongly prefers his email lists to be “clean” and from people who  have “opted in” and agreed to have porn mailings sent to them.                                I began getting sleepy on the plane so I didn't finish this on the flight home.     I'm now sitting in my little studio apartment, listening to Michael Bublé's new album.  It's quite good.  Let's think about this for a second:   kids don't have credit cards  .  They have no way of making a purchase.  And if they steal their parents' card, the charge will be reversed, which is very bad for adult business.  The banks scrutinize the industry more than most other businesses.  Charge reversals, also called “chargebacks”, are very bad.  If an account exceeds a certain very-low percentage it is shut down.  Chargebacks are to  be avoided like the plague.  And, puh-leeze don't give me the BS line that pornographers want to get kids hooked on porn so that they'll eventually become a customer when they actually CAN make a purchase.  Wanna know why that line of thinking is crap?          Because nature takes care of that on its own  .  Porn's appeal is built in to the majority of the human population.  We're sexual creatures.  I hate spam.  I wish it didn't exist.  I'd be very happy to see it legislated away.  See, I'm all for free speech and allowing people to do as they pleased, but I don't see spam as “free speech”.  I see it as someone contacting me without my permission.  It infringes on MY rights.  I didn't seek it out.              Still, my constant readers, the point I want to make with all of this is that people in the porn world are no different than you and I.  Neither are spammers.  They're not ogres.   If we wish to change hearts we must realize that.  It's way too easy to paint “those people” as monsters.  I guess that's human nature as well.  It's simply not true, though.       Those people are... just people.  ------------------------------ (now comes some boring, mundane discussion on how I prevent spam from reaching me) How can you protect yourself from porn spam?  There are a million articles online that answer that question.  Do a search for them.  Frankly, I don't want to spend the time to list a bunch of spam prevention techniques.  The thought of doing so is about as appealing as being a member of the President's Cabinet .  But I'll be happy to tell you how I personally live a pretty much spam-free life: Spam Arrest -and- Gmail Spam Arrest charges a fee ($19.95 for six months - after the free 30 day trial), but it works very well.  How it works is that Spam Arrest becomes your mail server.  As a Spam Arrest customer I can put my friends and acquaintances on a “safe list” and all of their mail will reach me.  If, however, you're not on my safe list you'll receive an email back from me that says something like: “Hey, this is Donny.  I'm using spam arrest to protect my inbox from junk mail.  Just this one time please click this link to verify that you're a real person" Once you've done so, you're then added to my safe list and will never again have to do that.  Since spammers use computers to generate their mailings, they'll never “verify” the mail they sent, and you'll never hear from them.  Spam Arrest also allows users to login to your account and browse blocked mail, just in case you need to manually add a sender to your safe list.  It works perfectly.  I've been using it for a few years now. I also use Gmail.  Gmail is free and owned by Google.  Their spam prevention techniques seem to work really well.  I have a couple different Gmail accounts that I use regularly.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/spamandthespammingspammerswhospamya.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Mon, 21 May 2007 14:12:49 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>THE PEOPLE OF PORN</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/thepeopleofporn.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Today is the 20th of April, 2007.  It's a beautiful Friday afternoon, which I'm spending in an airplane flying to Fort Wayne, Indiana.  Tomorrow is “Porn and Pancakes” again.  I love these events.  I take them very seriously.  In my opinion, events such as these could very well change churches for the better.  I believe in these events.  I thank God the Pastors of XXXChurch decided to launch their ministry.  I truly believe it will change the world.  Porn is such a huge struggle for men.  Christian men are no exception.  In fact, from personal experience I think it's safe to say that pornography affects Christian men to an even greater extent than those outside the church.  Why do I say that?  Because almost every Christian male who struggles with this issue has some sort of belief that he must hide his weakness.  That he won't be looked at the same if he admits his problem.  That he'll lose his position in the church.  That his wife will not understand.  The list goes on and on.  The key, I think, to overcoming this problem is to talk about it.  To be real about it.  To be educated about it.  To remove the mystery of it.  Today I want to write a little about my former colleagues in the business.  Like any industry, there are good people and bad people.  Perhaps I'm optimistic about the nature of people, but I firmly believe most people are good at heart.  Or at least wish to be good.  The world of pornography is no different.  If you, my constant readers, have been under the impression that people in adult entertainment have to be slimy or of low personal integrity, think again.  That's simply not the case.  Do such people exist in the business?  Of course.  But that's true of any marketplace.  Regardless of how they now feel about me, I really like most of the people I worked with in the business.  J & R, a couple I once considered amongst my closest friends, are normal everyday people.  They run a successful adult business from their home office.  They have a teenager that they're doing their very best to raise, and they live in a nice neighborhood.  They are strong supporters of their local University's sports teams and love having a good time.  They work their asses off.  Am I allowed to use that word here?  If not, I'm doing so anyway.  It's simply the best way to describe their work ethic.  J & R's monthly income from their adult business is more than the majority of the population makes in a year, yet the last time we spoke in detail one of them also held another professional “non adult” job.  There was always a bit of concern about what might happen if co-workers were to find out the true nature of their “home based” business, as it had always been presented as “internet marketing” or “internet consulting” to those who asked.   It's technically true:  they use a network of “free” sites to feed traffic to subscription based porn sites.  Most of said “pay” sites belong to other companies, who pay them a nice percentage of the money that results from the sales generated by their traffic.  That's definitely internet marketing.   J & R also own a successful “mature” program (in the world of porn, “mature” refers to women over age 30).  Belinda and I were not only friends, we were also content providers for J & R.  We'd recruit mature models for them and produce content to their specifications.  On a personal level, we'd communicate almost daily.  We'd chat about the business.  About affiliates (people who send traffic and “market” sites).  About kids.  I was always flattered when they'd ask my advice on how to handle a parenting issue.  I talked them into buying their daughter a Mac.  We'd meet at least once a year and a few times they'd fly out to stay at our house for a week or so.  J once stayed a month just to get away for awhile.  They introduced Belinda and me to Indian food.   For that alone, I'm forever grateful (it's SO good).  J & R are very good people.  We don't talk anymore.  I'm not entirely sure why that is, but after the last adult industry convention, where they spent a few days with Belinda and her new boyfriend, they will no longer speak to me.  That bums me out.  I miss being able to say hello to them or to Razz them about using those inferior PCs.  A fellow photographer from Portland is a person I still consider to be a very good friend.  He goes by the name Aaron Matthews.  He's very talented.  Like I did, Aaron produces content for several companies, the most recognizable include Hustler and Penthouse.  He makes a very good living and travels the world.  He loves his job. Aaron has a strong personality, but is one of the most tender hearted people I've met in my life.  If you tell him I said so he'll laugh and try to deny it, but it's true.  Aaron allows himself to be vulnerable to his friends.  He opens himself up and gives access to those he cares about, which makes him easy to wound if his heart isn't treated right.   He has little patience for ignorance.   In reality, Aaron is the only person from the adult industry that has not turned on me since I've become a Christian.  Not long after surrendering my life to God, Aaron took me to his parents' house.  I'm pretty sure he expected his father to talk me out of Christianity.  One of my clients, who operated amateur websites and made millions of dollars per year, is amongst the most well educated individuals I've met.  He and his wife enjoy a great life together with their young daughter.  He has other kids from a previous marriage.  He used to own and operate a business in the automotive industry.  He's a very smart man and very proud of his heritage.  I could go on and on about people such as these.  What is my point?  My point, dear readers, is that most of the people who produce porn and/or own porn companies are normal, everyday people like you and me.  They live quiet lives.  They laugh and love.  The have good families.  They treat their business like any other business owner.  It's a job.  It's a profession.  It's a career.  These people are not scary ogres.  Are there exceptions?  Of course.  But as I said before, the same can be said about any line of business.  And despite what many Christians might think, pornographers won't be legislated out of business.  They're too smart to just sit back and allow such things to happen.  Besides, legislation will NEVER change the hearts of anyone.   I can't tell you how much it bothers me to hear the ramblings of groups such as the Family Research Council, which seem to think we can pass laws to improve “morality” in our country.  That's just not the case.  God himself gave us the choice to make our own decisions.  Which of us is above God?  I have a dream that someday the church will get off its butt and stop talking about “winning the lost for Christ” from the safety of their pews.  It's time to get out and talk to people where they live.  It's time to stop judging and start loving.  It's time to start changing HEARTS instead of telling people what to do.  -------  It's now Saturday and I'm sitting in the airport at Ford Wayne, Indiana, waiting for my plane to board for Chicago.  From there I'll transfer to another flight and ultimately land in Sacramento this evening.  This morning at Porn and Pancakes Katie Couric sent her team to film the event for an upcoming story on the CBS Evening News.  If things go as the last event, where Anderson Cooper (from CNN) sent his team, any footage of me will be cut from the final story.  A local Indianapolis station also showed up.  Prior to the event they asked me to speak with them on camera for a few minutes.  One of the things I hope they air is that I am NOT “anti porn industry”.  I firmly believe in our rights as citizens of the USA.  I do not want to take away freedoms from anyone, nor do I want to demonize those involved in porn.  I simply want to tell people all sides of the porn story and let them make their own decisions.  I want individuals to take accountability for their actions.  I want men and women who “only look at the free sites” to realize that they're just as responsible as anyone else for the lives that are broken and shattered by pornography.  And yes, lives are indeed broken and shattered by porn.  Not ALL lives, perhaps, but more than I'm willing to ignore.  In the years I spent in the business I've watched many girls' lives changed for the negative after working for me.  I want all consumers to be educated and able to make an informed decision.  I believe the Jesus I read about in the Bible, the man who loved everyone, provides a way of healing the broken hearted.  That includes those who work in porn and those who consume it.  What can you do to “combat” porn?  Love people and show them the way to God.  Trust Him to do the rest.  He doesn't need YOU doing his job by telling others how to conduct themselves.  And remember:  there is nothing anyone could ever do to make God love them any less.  This includes pornographers, and it includes you.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/thepeopleofporn.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sat, 21 Apr 2007 13:49:42 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>UPCOMING DISCUSSIONS  GIVE ME YOUR FEEDBACK</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/upcomingdiscussionsgivemeyourfeedback.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[For several weeks now I've been working on a story for this blog.  I keep thinking I'm going to get it finished, then something new arises and I realize I'm not done yet.  I wanted to share with you the story of one of my models, whose life has totally changed course after working for me.  I wanted to do her story justice.  While writing that story, another model contacted me.  I decided I'd include her story as well.  Then another model contacted me.  I decided I'd just save the article I'm writing as a draft, continue working on it to get it just right, and begin discussing other things here.  This is what I have in mind:  	I want to address the issue of pornographers targeting under aged children with their spam emails.  You're going to get a different side to this story that you may not expect.  I'll give you a hint:  legitimate pornographers DO NOT want to target under aged individuals.  I'll tell you more about that in an upcoming article.   	I also want to educate you on the opinions of the majority in the porn world regarding the .xxx top level domain issue.  I've received several email blasts from the Family Research Council saying that .xxx is just another ploy by pornographers to spread their product more widely.  They couldn't be more mistaken.  Pornographers are not happy WHATSOEVER about  the idea of a .xxx TLD.   	I'd like to present you with information portrayed by a documentary called "Traffic Control".  It's a movie that offers a great solution to those concerned about access to porn.  The solution is revolutionary, in my opinion.  The good part about it:  it doesn't take away anyone's rights.  Porn producers are still free to do as they please, but those consumers who'd like a porn free internet are able to finally have their wish granted.  I'd also like to "open the floor" so to speak and ask you, the readers, what you'd like to know about the porn industry.  Feel free to post suggestions in the comments area, or to email me directly:  donny @ xxxchurch.com]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/upcomingdiscussionsgivemeyourfeedback.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:46:40 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>OUCH!</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ouch.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Lately I've been making an attempt to contact former models.  I want to let them know that I am no longer producing porn, and that I wish to apologize for ever getting them involved in the business.  After apologizing, if the conversation continues, I also want to interview those who are willing to be interviewed.  I want to find out if working with my former business has had any effect on their life.  Last week I sent a MySpace message to one of them.  Here is her reply: Huh... funny you should write. I just got a fresh reminder of why I regret everyday doing what I did for your business. Thanks for that. She hasn't bothered replying to the follow up message I sent.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/ouch.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sat, 17 Mar 2007 09:08:45 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>A MESSAGE FROM DONNY ABOUT DONNYSRAMBLINGS.COM</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/amessagefromdonnyaboutdonnysramblingscom.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[For those of you who got to this post looking for DonnysRamblings.com:  I'm sorry, but I've got to stop blogging about my personal life FOR NOW.  I'll still maintain "The Industry" blog here on xxxchurch.com about the realities of the world of porn, but my personal battles need to be between me, God and those I care about.   I need to devote as much of my time as possible to growing spiritually and running my new business.  I haven't deleted anything I've written.  I've just decided not to add any more entries to that blog for the time being.  You can still read everything I've written to this point, as I've left the blog here.  This hiatus could last a few days, a week, two months... I'm not sure.  Please don't be alarmed.  Things are just fine.  If you'd like to contact me, feel free to do so by email:   photography4me@hotmail.com or donny@xxxchurch.com  I've reposted a few of the last blog entries from DonnysRamblings.com on my MySpace page, so feel free to visit my page and join my MySpace friend's list:  http://www.myspace.com/donnypauling ------------------------------------  READ: "THE INDUSTRY" || XXXCHURCH MAIN || ARCHIVED ENTRIES FROM D.R.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/amessagefromdonnyaboutdonnysramblingscom.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sat, 17 Mar 2007 08:36:28 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>SHELLEY LUBBEN FORMER PORN STAR</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/shelleylubbenformerpornstar.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[Earlier today I received permission to repost a portion of an upcoming book by Shelley Lubben, an ex-porn star.  For those of you who haven't already heard of Shelley, I think it's time you meet her.  As part of removing the fantasy of porn, I think it's interesting to hear from one of the actresses.  Here's what Shelly Wrote: Women do not enjoy making porn movies.  Many believe the widespread fairytale that women enjoy making porn movies but in reality there are no happy endings for the women of porn. Women do NOT enjoy making porn movies and a closer behind-the-scenes look will show you several reasons why.  In the world of hardcore sex production, an average day on the porn set for a porn actress is a long and tedious process. Women are told to come in at 8 am for makeup but it's only to make certain porn actresses arrive on time to work. Porn stars have a terrible habit of arriving late because they're often hung over from drugs or alcohol from the night before.   After make up, porn actresses usually wait around long hours until it's their turn to do their scene. Some scenes take an hour and some take several hours to film. It really depends if the male actor in the first scene could "perform" or not. It also depends if female actresses have to stop the clock because they can't handle   the pain of a hardcore sex scene.   While waiting around for long hours, jaded porn performers are bored and usually end up in the rest rooms with bottles of alcohol and a few lines of speed or outside in their cars for a heroin fix or gathered in the back yard with other actors to smoke marijuana.  For me, I usually ended up in the back yard of some lavish mansion in Malibu with a bottle of Jack Daniels in my hand and a group of male porn actors standing nearby offering me hits of marijuana or lines of speed.  Other porn stars agree with me. Jenna Presley says in an interview with porn journalist, Luke Ford, "I think that 90% of the business does drugs or alcohol but maybe 70% have a problem. I include pot as a drug. I know people who come on set stoned and they can't perform. A drug problem to me is when it affects your work life."  To add to the mind-numbing process, women are never able to experience sexual pleasure during the making of a porn movie because of the continuous cutting during sex scenes. In the background the director constantly yells, "cut" and the flow of action is interrupted in order to get a better shot, adjust lighting or to wipe up bodily fluids. Repeatedly pornographers stop the scenes and some times ask actors to "freeze" in position during very hardcore sex acts, which causes great physical and emotional pain for porn actresses.  I speak from personal experience when I say to be in the middle of a hardcore sex act with several actors at the same time and told to "freeze" in position for several minutes while lighting or cameras are adjusted is extremely painful and degrading. It's also very humiliating when scenes are stopped in order to wipe up bodily fluids such as semen, feces and blood.Despite the fact that women do not enjoy making porn movies, they continue to lie to their fans and proudly insist they enjoy making porn movies. Of course they do. They get paid hundreds and thousands of dollars to lie because this is their profession. Porn stars are paid professional liars who know how to "act" and they do it well. In fact, because porn stars spend a great deal time in front of the camera and never step out of character, they usually have more acting abilities than mainstream Hollywood actors.   I used to brag endlessly to fans and pornographers about my extreme "Italian" sex drive and how I loved making porn movies. I would go on and on about how I needed more   and more to fulfill my insatiable appetite. I lied 100% of the time to 100% of the people. Lying is the native language of porn stars because they can't afford to tell you the truth. Not only would it ruin the fantasy for their fans but more importantly, it would ruin the amount of their paychecks. Don't believe porn actresses when they proudly proclaim they enjoy making porn movies.  They're ACTING. Thank you for letting me repost that, Shelley.  I'm in the process of interviewing former models who have posed for me so that I can bring you an inside look directly from girls who's lives I personally affected.  Stay tuned...  (you can visit Shelley's MySpace page by clicking here,  or visit her website by clicking here)]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/shelleylubbenformerpornstar.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Sun, 04 Mar 2007 20:32:28 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>PORN'S HUMAN TOLL  PART 1</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/pornshumantollpart1.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[On October 5th, 2006 I answered my cell phone to the sound of a girl in tears. It was one of the girls who had modeled for me.  I knew right away what the problem was: someone she knows found her photos online. She begged me to do something to get her off the internet, but there's really nothing I can do. The companies who own the copyrights will not remove them. I know this from experience.  When interviewing models I'd tell them it's very likely someone they know will find them. But no matter how often a model hears this, she either doesn't care or never thinks it will happen to her.  Yes, perhaps someone else will be found, but not me. My dad doesn't even own a computer. My uncles would never be surfing porn sites. Etc. Etc. Etc.  On top of being told verbally, models have to sign a five page release that makes it clear what they can expect. For some reason it seems the more they are warned, the more they want to pose. I guess that's just human nature.  That particular morning, the girl told me some of her friends found her photos, which somehow led to her father finding out as well as her employer. Donny, my dad found out.  I didn't think he would.  He never looks at porn!  My uncle found me and told daddy about me.  Now he doesn't want to talk to me.  He says I've shamed my family.  Oh my God, Donny.  There has to be SOME way to get that stuff off the internet!       My boyfriend is telling me he's going to leave.  He doesn't want to date a porn star and I don't blame him.  But Donny, I am pregnant.  I can't be without him.  I need him so bad right now, especially with everyone else mad at me.  I hate this.  I just want it to stop.  I'll pay ANYTHING if you can just make those photos go away.  PLEASE!  I am BEGGING you to do something! She breaks down crying.  I can do nothing for her.  I feel like crap.  Yes, it was ultimately her decision but it's something she never would have done had she not met me...   The model herself never thought posing was that big a deal and couldn't understand why everyone made it out to be one, but her life was ripped apart by this.  So was the life of her family.  She ended up losing her job and her boyfriend over it.  Was her family, friends, employer too hard on her?  In my opinion they were, but does that knowledge help her when her life is in shambles?  Of course not.  And this is just a mild case.  This has happened before, of course. Eventually the whole incident will blow over and settle down. But it illustrates exactly what I mean when I tell people that I have little personal attraction to pornography. When asked why I can say this I reply with something like, "When I see a pornographic image or video, instead of seeing what the model is doing in the photo or video I see her two weeks after it was shot. The money has been spent and she's crying on the phone asking that her photos be removed because her family has found out and are telling her that she's shamed them."  I used to reconcile these problems by reminding myself that the model had been warned and made her own decision. Even so, it would take a very cold person not to feel her pain. I take responsibility for the part I played.  It would be easy to lay the blame for her pain and suffering on the people around her, who should love her instead of judge her.  But in the real world it doesn't really matter what OTHER PEOPLE should do.  We can't control other people.  We just control ourselves.  Models lives are ruined every day by being involved in porn.  Of course there are ALWAYS ways to rationalize it and say it's not wrong.  Human beings are really good at coming up with ways to make it okay to do whatever it is we wish to do.  I've witnessed the brokenness first hand.  I've seen the light die in the eyes of many models.  Those girls are our sisters.  Our daughters.  Our friends.  Every one of them is special.  That, my friends, is why I can't look at porn.  That is why I attempt to look every woman in the face, instead of sizing her up or looking to see if she has a nice butt.  I don't look men up and down when I meet them, so why am I tempted to do so with girls?  The story I shared tonight is tame.  I have plenty to tell.  They'll get progressively more graphic.  Stick around.  I want to strip away the fantasy of porn from your mind and replace it with reality.   Each Wednesday I'll share a little more.  Come back.  Post a comment.  Share a story.  Visit my personal site.  Add me to your friends list on myspace (click here to visit my myspace page).  Let's get to know each other.  Let's get real.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/pornshumantollpart1.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Feb 2007 23:08:28 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>THIS ISN'T YOUR FATHER'S PLAYBOY</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/thisisntyourfathersplayboy.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[My section of the xxxchurch website is called The Industry, and that's exactly what I plan to reveal to you.  In some cases it's ugly.  In others, it's intriguing.  During porn shoots, the things that go on behind the scenes are often stomach churning.  I plan to bring all of that to you.  Today, however, I want to dispel a common misconception:  that Playboy, the most recognized name in porn, is a "soft porn" company.  Just a few days ago I received the very last 1099 I'll ever get from the company.  1099 tax forms come from Playboy Enterprises, Inc. and Consolidated Subsidiaries.  It's those Consolidated Subsidiaries that make the company quite different than the Playboy you think you know.  One thing I always found interesting was the fighting amongst subsidiaries.  Playboy's Chicago staff seems to have an elitist attitude and feels they're better than the lowly internet porn employees from other subsidiaries.  It's actually quite amusing to witness.  The first time the print and internet divisions had to work together on a project was during one of Playboy's Casting Calls in Tampa, Florida, an event I was fortunate enough to attend.  Everyone tolerated each other well during the event, but it was just a few months later when fighting broke out between them.  Come to think of it, that kinda sounds like many modern churches, don't you think?  But let's move on to the point of this entry...  Although soft porn is what built Playboy and is still what most people think of when the Bunny comes to mind, it's simply not the case anymore.  Playboy actually owns some of the most graphic, sexually explicit hardcore porn sites on the Internet.  If you were to read Playboy's financial Form 8-K you might notice a mention of a company called ICS, Incorporated.   ICS is a wholly owned subsidiary of Playboy and is the name under which the company's hardcore porn sites are run.   Playboy also purchased porn star Jenna Jameson's Club Jenna, Inc.  Club Jenna offers hardcore DVDs and internet sites as well.  Speaking of DVDs, the company also sells hardcore DVD titles through another of their subsidiaries known as Spice Studios, formerly called Cinemaplay.  I can only speculate as to why Playboy hides the hard porn behind various wholly owned subsidiaries.  Perhaps associating the bunny with explicit pornography might dampen subscription numbers to the main magazine.  That's probably a good business decision on their part.  I'm sure many loyal readers would be offended by the harder stuff.  But Playboy has learned that relying on soft porn magazine subscribers won't keep the company alive.  Through new projects and acquisitions, Playboy now leads the pack in the world of hardcore porn.  This is not the same company whose magazines appeared beneath your father's mattress.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/thisisntyourfathersplayboy.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Feb 2007 00:48:04 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>HERPES WARTS  MISC STDs  SEXY?</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/herpeswartsmiscstdssexy.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[I told you this blog wasn't going to be pretty.  I intend to replace the fantasy of porn with a bit of reality.  Let's get started by talking STDs.  Since I'm pretty tired at the moment I'm going to keep this particular blog entry relatively short and will likely delve into this topic in a bit more depth in the future.  I'm not going to get all clinical on you and spit out the results of fancy sounding studies.  Instead I'll just share what I've learned from experience in the world of porn production.  A world where Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) were a part of normal life.  Genital herpes and genital warts are very common.  On more times than you'd care to imagine, a model would show up for a shoot with burn marks from having warts removed.  It we were shooting solo photos (no interaction with another person) the shoot could go on.  After all, Photoshop could be used to easily remove the marks.  Many times a model would be photographed and we'd see herpes or warts that she might not even be aware existed.  Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are also common.  Chlamydia outbreaks amongst adult performers is something that's almost expected.  Do you find that sexy?  "But Donny, I thought performers have to be tested?"  You're right, they do.  But mostly just for HIV.  It's kinda hard to test for STDs that are only evident when a person is broken out.  The next time you find yourself sitting in front of a TV about to watch a porn video, keep in mind that odds are likely the actress that catches your eye probably had warts burned off just days before "acting" in the video you're watching.  More have STDs than do NOT have STDs.  Again I'll ask:  Do you find that sexy?]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/herpeswartsmiscstdssexy.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Feb 2007 00:48:07 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


		<item>
		<title>ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF</title>
		<link>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/allowmetointroducemyself.html</link>
		<description><![CDATA[A year ago you may have extended your hand to me and I would have replied to your name with, "I'm Donovan Phillips".  Had conversation progressed I'd quickly have revealed to you that I was a porn producer, particularly if I had any inkling that you were a Christian.  I was not ashamed of my profession, and I loved shocking Christians.  I never knew what type of reaction to expect when I revealed my career choice, but I always looked forward to finding out.  Today I introduce myself to you with my birth name: Donny Pauling, a man doing his best to follow Jesus the Christ.  A man who is at peace in the midst of storms.  A man who has a hope that God will use him to accomplish great things, yet even if not chosen to do so will follow and serve and love his Creator with all of his heart.  One of the things I believe God will use me for is to help remove the fantasy of pornography from those who struggle with it, replacing said fantasy with reality.  Right here, on this blog, I will pursue that purpose.  It may get a bit ugly.  But let's start with something light.  Let's start with an email I received from a former model.  She'd been reading my personal blog and, at first, couldn't believe I'd become a Christian.  She... well, I'll let her tell you.  Donny,  I am a former model for you, I do not want to use my name because of what I experienced with that, but I did want to comment. I have been reading your blog for a few months, and I am very impressed. I'll admit, I was shocked at first just because I stumbled upon your blog and was like "whoa".  I found this post exceptionally personal, to me at least, because if you remember my "finding out" involved some very damaging events involving my boyfriend, and some friends of his. Like so many other young women, it made my life a living hell. And like I'm sure you realize now, most women posing for you were already going through a personal hell that had brought them there.  I am very sorry for what you are going through, in a way, I've been there. It seems almost ironic that 2 years ago you were telling me that my boyfriend should be more open-minded and concilatory to me posing.  What I learned from the experience was that it made me a stronger individual, and I hope (as it seems it has) that it does the same for you. Even then, I knew you were an extremely GOOD person, something I could never explain to anyone else adequately when asked, but I myself knew to be true.  God Bless,  J  To which I replied:  J,  Thank you for your grace. There are many models I'd like to look in the face and tell them I'm sorry. I want them to see that I mean it. If you run across any other girls who've modeled for me please tell them to read my blog and to contact me via email if they're willing to do so. I want to apologize to them.  And to you, I am so sorry for what you went through. I can't express in words how truly sorry I am. I wish I'd have felt your pain on a deeper level as it happened, because if I really deeply understood I'd have stopped long ago. All I can really say is that I was in a different place back then.  Honestly, I don't know how to make up for it. I ask myself that question from time to time and as of yet don't have an answer.  Again, thank you for your grace and for saying that you felt I was still a good person. I really appreciate that. I would like to make a promise to you and to the other girls that I'll spend the rest of my life doing whatever I reasonably can do to keep others from having to go through what you went through.  - Donny -  As you will see, there is much more to porn than meets the eyes, my constant readers.  In this blog I intend to show you that.  I invite you to come along.  Please, take this ride with me.]]></description>
		<guid>http://xxxchurch.com/blogs/theindustry/allowmetointroducemyself.html</guid>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Feb 2007 13:22:26 -0500</pubDate>
		</item>


	</channel>
</rss>
