Letter to myself:
Hey, you don’t know when all of this started but you know that as the years pass by its just something that follows you on. You have been living a double life because people see you as this great smart and beautiful girl with a bright future on the outside but really don’t know that you are struggling with porn addiction within. It has always been your little secret but you know that it’s not really a secret to who matters the most.. God. You are a strong lady who is able to fight this battle and win because you can do all things through Christ that strengthens you. You are an overcomer. Believe in yourself and put Jesus at the forefront of your mind. You have gone 3 weeks without it before and you can go the rest of your life without it. There will be times when you feel like you might break but just remember that Jesus is there to fix you. If not for anyone else, do this for Him.
Letter from my sex addict:
I believe that I can overcome this addiction but I sometimes fear that I won’t. The fact that I am a hopeless romantic doesn’t help because I love liiving in the fantasy of being with my Prince Charming and that urges me deeper into this addiction. To be honest I tell myself I’m not an addict yet because I can go for days without it but then If I have to go back to it after staying away then isn’t that an addiction? It probably is and it feels so good during but then I feel disgusting afterwards. I don’t want God to leave me. I don’t want my future to be compromised because of my sinful nature. I want to be free from this and I want to be filled with the Holy Spirit but I feel like I have said this so many times and have let God and myself down so many times. I want to fulfil Gods plan for me and also use my talents to his glory and I can’t do any of these without being a hypocrite if I’m still living in sin. I just want to be free in Christ.