The time has come for radical change. No longer will you run the show. No longer will you be able to push my buttons. Endlessly you have convinced me that you are who I am. You have effectively crippled my witness, you have caused me to wallow in guilt and drown my feelings with alcohol. Sure, you have loosened your grip over the years. No longer do I act out physically, no longer am I obsessed with images. But, my thoughts…you have convinced me that I cannot surrender my thoughts. Relentlessly you effect the way I view others, causing me to see through a skewed lens.
However, my eyes have shifted their focus. I will look to the future. I will embrace change and the possibility of being pure in thought, word and deed. I will not yield to discouragement or defeat. I will fight against all that would seek to ensnare me and I will not relent.
Oh, and by the way I will win. I will win because I will no longer be fighting in my own strength. My weakness has compelled me into the arms of another. No, I haven’t finally forsaken my vows and fallen into the arms of a false lover, my weakness has compelled my into the arms of Jesus Christ. He is un beatable and full of grace and truth. He has forgiven me and will raise me up in His strength to forsake sexual fantasies.
“How do I plan to accomplish this?” You ask.
The Word and worship.
I will get help.
I will look for support here in town.
I will not give up…ever. Never.