Letter to myself:
I never wanted to meet you. Ever since I found my father’s drawings of our neighbor laying naked on a table, you became curious in my life. Then we found the video back in third grade. At first, I was repulsed, but then it grew on me.. you grew on me. After 9th grade I forced you out of my life because I thought I was in love. Following the break up I begged you to come back and that was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. Because of your curiosity, I gave something to someone that did not belong to him, I started watching the videos again and again because I became insecure. Because of your curiosity, I am lost. I think of unholy things in holy situations and no matter what I do to change my thoughts you attack them. When my grandmother passed away, I turned to you instead of God. Now when I look back it’s your fault that I am depressed. It is your doing that has led me to taking these little green pills just to make it another day. I want to be closer to my God. Because I know that even though I did not wait, he will always wait for me. So good bye, dark side of me. I don’t want you in my life anymore.
Letter from my sex addict:
You don’t know what you’re talking about. Finding your father’s drawing gave you a head start growing up. Those pictures brought me to life. It’s because of my curiosity that you will make your future husband happy. I did nothing wrong, all I did was show you a side of you that is sexy and mysterious. I did not make you depressed, how can I do that? I’m apart of you, so you did that yourself. You can’t get rid of me because I will haunt you at night, when you’re alone. You will feel my presence no matter where you go and no matter who you talk to. I will be there. And you will give in just as you have many times before.