Letter to myself:

Dear Sex Addict,

You and I have grown up together. Like a twin or a shadow. As I have grown up and matured, so have you. As my tastes have matured, your pallet has widened so that you can survive. Every time I close a door, you introduce me to a new room full of toys that whose spell will be a long time in breaking.

I am writing this to tell you that our relationship is over. You have fed off the lies I believe like a parasite and attempted to sap me of all of my strength. How is this good for me? You are the amalgamation of everything I hate in today’s men. You do not give relationships; you destroy relationships. You hurt my sisters with your pride and soil everything that is good. How many nights have you promised me intimacy? Hm? How many days have you laid your cold hand on my shoulder and promised my anxiety would go away? You know how much I hate liars. How much promises are worth to me. Yours are worth nothing. Your words are poison.

Let me lay this out for you so you can understand: You have NOTHING to offer me. You have hurt me and hurt the ones I love. You constantly steal from me what is only meant for a woman. A wife. Your position is looking bleak.

You’re an addict. You live only for your next fix. And like an addict, you’re ready to sacrifice any real happiness or substance for the next glance of something you won’t actually ever obtain. This isn’t the way. This IS NOT for me. I am under God’s love and I will always be His Son. I am perfectly loved by Him. You are nothing. Spoilers: According to my God, you’re already dead.

So now, I’m giving you up. You are being replaced by new thinking. Right thinking. A mind that Christ and no one else (least of all you) can offer me. My mind and spirit belong to God – to do with as He pleases. This body is crafted by him. It’s desires placed there for a Holy purpose. Someday, this body and it’s desires will belong to a wife – to do with as SHE pleases, not I.

My brothers will stand beside me. My elders stand beside me. I have an entire army of men that love me. They outnumber you by a vast margin. Let me make this clear: The more you reach and grab for what is not yours, the louder I will get. The more honest I will get.

You do not stand a chance.

So run. Run and tell your lies to the shadows.

Not ever yours,

A Son of God.

Letter from my sex addict:

Dear Failure,

You will never be free of me. Why would you want to be? I introduce you to new experiences that your friends and especially that tight-wound church you go to would never tell you about. You know all those things that a woman would be unwilling to do with you? No worries. You can live them out right here. I know your heart is hurting, I’m here to help. Why bother with all that work that goes into a relationship? Women are hard work. They’re never satisfied, you can never read them, and no matter how close you get to them with…ugh…love, they’ll just find a new way to hide. AND, lest we forget, woman have the right to change their mind. Look, you’re a competent fellow, probably able to snag any girl you’d like, but then what? She won’t stay. Why would she. Look at you. (I mean, if we’re just being honest, friend). She’ll quickly find a new man, someone who’ll satisfy her new tastes for the moment. It’s just far too much work if you ask me.

Yes, this is so much easier. Your needs: Met. Immediately. Perfect candidates to ogle at. Perfect form and all at your beckon call. Believe me, I know. They’re all here…JUST for you. You’ll never be free of me. Let’ s just get that nonsense out of the way. YOU are the man you hate so much. You’re no different. And your sisters, pff. They’ll never know. They’ll get over it. Really. Look, if it’s bothered you this much, I understand. I’ve been too loud. We can do this quietly. Just stop telling people about it. We can keep this in the corner and then NO ONE gets hurt. Especially those kids you’re living with. They’ll never know…

Sincerely,

Your Sex Addict