Letter to myself:

No one ever thinks they will go this far. You may not be far down the road, but you are scared of the road you are on. Be bold, Otherwise your life will go down a road you think you know, but you could lose control of.

Don’t fear yourself out of this, Facts don’t drive you clearly, because shame as a driver doesn’t last. Give this up. love yourself enough to leave this. Love yourself enough to know that you are hurting others but you can do something about this. Fight for your future. Live in the grace. Don’t settle. Be honest, even if it is your biggest fear. You know you want the best for your future, you want to be married, to have kids, to point others to Christ.

The truth- God loves you. God is calling you. God is far more powerful. What Christ did on the cross frees all. God forgives you.

Letter from my sex addict:

Keep sweeping this problem under the rug. You act like you don’t want me around, but in reality, I bring you what you think you want. Keep acting like you will win, in fact sometimes I will make it look like you will win. You won’t.

All the rules you make, all the stipulations you have, it just won’t work. So it seems.