In March of 2021 something significant happened for XXXchurch.com – it was rebirthed.
This rebirthing meant a brand new website, new branding, new leadership, and most importantly – new vision and direction.
For almost 20 years XXXchurch’s mission was three-fold.
- To raise awareness concerning the issues surrounding pornography.
- To help prevent people from seeing or getting hooked on pornography.
- To assist those who’ve been ensnared by addiction with their recovery.
But in March we made a change; not because awareness, prevention, and recovery are bad things…but because what we need now as a society are more safe places to explore these matters, finding the support and encouragement needed while doing so.
Someone has to create these communities.
Someone has to foster these communities.
Someone has to protect these communities.
And that’s where we come in.
Because while Live Free and XXXchurch will continue to push the envelope diving into real and honest conversions that make most uncomfortable, we are going to make sure that there are safe places for anyone who needs help, support, and grace.
Why is community so important?
That’s what we will be tackling this month. But to kick things off, I want to offer three reasons that community is a must for a person’s recovery and healing.
1. Community is biologically beneficial.
Our body relies on something called neurotransmitters. These neurotransmitters function as the body’s chemical messengers used by the nervous system to transmit messages between neurons, or from neurons to muscles.
Without neurotransmitters our bodies simply don’t function. In fact, we would die without these critical agents of communication.
There are seven different neurotransmitters, one of which is the hormone Oxytocin.
Oxytocin (also called the love drug) serves as a powerful bonding agent that is released during breast feeding and sexual activity (i.e orgasm) and plays an undeniably important role in establishing and maintaining relationships.
Oxytocin has a profound impact on one’s overall emotional health and influences things like decision making, sexual arousal, social skills, stress management, and sleep (just to name some).
Important stuff folks.
And when someone doesn’t have enough oxytocin it can lead to depression, increased anxiety, poor impulse control, poor communication, aggression, and an inability to feel affectionate.
Guess what… being part of a group increases one’s oxytocin levels.
This is why animals travel in packs, why we feel safer within a group than when we are all alone, and why healthy support communities can play such a huge impact in a person’s recovery journey. Because these activities promote the release of oxytocin and positively impact one’s overall emotional health.
2. Theologically speaking, we were created for community.
In the first few pages of the Bible we read, “ Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’” And so God created woman and ensured that the human experience was not one of solitary existence.
But yet, when we find ourselves struggling in life, often our tendency is to pull away and isolate. And while that decision may feel safe, it’s actually the worst thing you can do – and God knew that.
One of my favorite passages in the Bible is Ecclesiastes 4:9-10:
“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.”
Did you catch that?
That’s about as clear as a warning you can get.
Healthy communities like Live Free and Small Groups Online exist to ensure that you don’t find yourself in real trouble by providing a place where you can find the people you need to support you when falling down.
3. No other resource we’ve put out has had the type of impact that our small group communities have had.
I worked for XXXchurch as an employee for almost 8 years. Over that time I was part of launching various workshops, books, courses, and other things. And while many of those resources were helpful, I’ve never seen anything produce the type of life change in men and women that our small groups program has produced.
I’ve personally seen men come into a group who struggle with porn on a daily basis ony to find complete freedom months or sometimes years later. Not just once or twice, but over and over and over again.
In fact, of our 60+ leaders, 90% of them are former small group members who started their recovery journey from the same place you may find yourself in today. Men and women who were in the same group as you, now leading their own groups helping other men and women find freedom experiencing all the benefits of that freedom along the way.
- Less shame.
- Healthier marriages.
- Better relationships.
- More purpose.
Clearly stated, community works.
In fact it is vital to recovery and those who think they can fix their situation without involving anyone else are sadly mistaken and will likely remain feeling stuck until they change their situation.
We deeply believe in the tremendous value of this resource.
In fact, we believe in it so much we reduced the cost 25% in January (at a great expense to us) just to help make sure more people can experience the real life change that is possible though these groups.
We have groups for men, women, pastors, and spouses.
* Btw, if the idea of joining a group sounds way too scary because of the shame you feel in your life, check out my new book When Shame Gets Real.