Not really biblical values, although one of them (hate) is an emotion which we
are told to do in the Bible! (More on that later)
For me, these were all a part of recovery; getting rid of
anger, resentment and hate. Today, they are much less a part of my life
than before, but just like addiction, I still deal with it everyday.
It happened again the other night. I was invited to
a fund raiser put on by Shepherd’s
Heart Ministry. This great ministry provides a place for pastors
who are struggling with burn out, anger issues, sexual addiction, etc., it
gives pastors a place to go for free to spend time with God and renew their
When one of the pastors they had helped was introduced,
I was not prepared for what I would hear. His wife went to the podium
first and began something like this…”I remember the first time
I saw the images on his computer screen….”. This woman went
on to explain how her husband had been addicted to pornography for
a long time, how see felt she needed to cover it up or they would lose everything.
Well most of you know where these stories go and you are
right. This pastor went to his church, was allowed in front of his congregation
one more time to repent of his terrible sin, and fired. They had no income,
no money to get help, nothing…Except they found Shepherd’s Heart
Ministry, Praise God.
Anger….My wife asked me a very good question at that
moment; you see my wife works in corporate America. She said “When
we have an employee who we catch with porn on their computer or in their history,
we bring them in, counsel with them, tell them where to get help and let them
know we will not tolerate it any further; then we send them back to work. Why
do churches fire people?” A good question, one I have been asking
and asking and asking.
From the “Pastor Bible”types we get the law
1 Timothy 3:1-7, talking about being above reproach, good reputation, respectable…but
what is the example here if 60% of the men in the congregation are struggling,
what is the message? Why do we continue to shoot our fallen?
Pray for your pastor…find a church where they embrace
those who have fallen and risen from the ashes. Share the names of those
churches not only here but in your recovery groups. God is the way, do
not let the Pharisees of this modern world, the “Pastor Bible”types
turn you from Jesus, Who only came to save the lost (Matthew 15:24).
” But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice,
slander, and filthy language from your lips.”
Did you know you choose to be angry?
I learned this over the past several years and learning
that this is true has changed my life. I used to blame my anger on others…”Well
if my wife……”or “Work is stressful right now and ….”. I
always had an excuse, always found someone else to blame…But I choose
my emotions and if you do not believe this then answer this question; Have
you ever been mad at a traffic light? You know that light that is longer
than any other light in town…the one that always turns red as you approach…do
you know the one I am talking about? That light “makes”you
mad?? It is an inanimate object and yet it “makes”you mad…hmmmm. You
choose to be mad, we choose our own emotions and you can choose to change them.
I can’t change every church and the injustice of shooting
our weak…But I can change how I feel about it and what I do…and
so I share it with you and I look for those churches who truly follow who Jesus
was and is…He came for me, the broken, the sinner and He came for you…Check
of Hope in Birmingham Alabama…Now there is a great church! Click
on it and check it out…there are many more just like it and growing!!
Resentment….Well that is an easy one to fix. You
see Resentment is like me taking poison and hoping someone else dies…let
me repeat that.
Resentment is like me taking poison and hoping someone
Think about it. I carry around anger, hate and
resentment for people who I feel have wronged me and all it does is kill me…slowly. I
had to learn to let go and I did it by praying for people who I felt had wronged
me…it is not easy to start with, but I assure you my life is so much
better today and I have so much less anger because I gave up trying to change
what others thought or what I thought of others. Give it to God….let
Hate…Well that one is from God. Romans 12:9 “Hate
what is evil; cling to what is good.”…But always remember…Hate
the Sin, Not the Sinner…
Find the recovery groups; they are filled with love and
hope. But seek out a church, a place where sinners are embraced with
the love that Jesus meant for you to feel…the love He has shown me and
the light He provides in a world where there is so much darkness. Seek and
you will find…If you want us to find you a group or a church, just post your
city and which part of town and we will get you hope…
And always remember, You are all Great men of God!!