When it comes to our recovery one of the most crucial components to success is knowing our why. One of my favorite thinkers of the 20th century was an Austrian neurologist, psychologist, philosopher, and Holocaust survivor named Viktor Frankl. (Frankl’s seminal work Man’s Search for Meaning has impacted me more than any other piece of writing outside of the Bible. If you can get your hands on a copy, please read it).
Frankl, who during World War II lived through the horrors of the Nazi death camps at Auschwitz and Dachau, understood the importance of finding meaning in all situations, saying:
“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.”
I can say from experience that this is true. The times when I have struggled the most were times when I didn’t feel like I had a tremendous sense of purpose or direction, when I was struggling to make sense of my circumstances or find meaning in them.
It is times like this when we become particularly vulnerable to temptation.
As Frankl also noted, “When a person can’t find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.”
That is why we must consistently keep our why in the forefront of our minds. We can write it down in a journal, reflect on it daily, or post it on an index card on our wall. If we are consciously able to our keep our reasons for wanting to freedom in our thoughts, it will give us far greater power to overcome moments when we feel like yielding to the fleeting allure of porn.
For me, my why is that I want to be a better man for myself, my wife and my daughter. I want to make decisions and form habits that please God and benefit me. I want to help other men who struggle with this addiction to find hope and freedom. I want to use my gift of writing as one way to inspire and encourage others.
The preceding paragraph was the first time in a while I wrote down my why so clearly. I encourage you to do the same and write yours down as well. Revisit your why as often as possible as it may change, but always keep it at the forefront of your mind. This will help give you inner strength the next time you stare temptation in the face.
I leave you with one more Frankl quote in which he cites another famous philosopher: “There is much wisdom in the words of Nietzsche: ‘He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how’.”
Find your why and you will gain new strength in your journey towards freedom.