What does the word “freedom” mean to YOU? 

This is a question that’s been on my mind quite a bit lately, especially given the chaotic political climate of the world we live in.

There are so many people out there (maybe you are one of them) that desperately want “freedom” in their lives, but seem to be confused on what that actually looks like. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that many who claim they want freedom are just working their way toward another form of servitude.

What they fail to realize is that freedom is both a process and a destination.

This is especially true for many seeking “freedom from porn” in their lives. 

Because when you try to define freedom as solely a result, you miss the bigger picture. You rob yourself of a deeper and richer understanding of the tangible benefits that freedom offers you. And so if you find yourself in a place where you need to redefine what freedom looks like, make sure you factor in these considerations.

First, TRUE freedom is holistic.

Freedom means more than just being free of,

  • your unwanted behaviors themselves.
  • the shame of engaging in those behaviors.
  • the urge to look or engage.
  • the loneliness and isolation you feel.
  • the need to be secretive about your choices and bad decisions.

It’s all of that… and more.

Just because you are currently sober doesn’t mean you are living in freedom.

Just because you’ve learned to accept your unwanted behavior doesn’t mean you’ve found freedom.

Just because your struggles are somewhat in the past doesn’t mean you’re experiencing freedom.

Ultimately, freedom isn’t just something you can claim to have based on what you do or don’t do – it’s something you have to authentically experience.

Second, TRUE freedom is not perfect.

Recognize that the pursuit of freedom is a process. It takes time and work. It’s often something you need to literally fight for. And even when you believe you’ve found a measure of freedom in your life, there will still be challenges.

There will be growing pains.
There are going to be bumps in the road.
There are going to be setbacks.

But when facing adversity or disappointment, you don’t need to abandon your efforts. 

You just need to understand that sometimes mistakes happen, and all we can do is try our best to fix those things and move forward because that’s what our freedom demands.

Lastly, TRUE freedom requires the willingness to share your struggles in the first place.

You need to get to a place where you are not afraid to be fully known, scars and all.

You need to understand that the acceptance of others does not define your value or worth. That we all have our own personal demons and your “demon” is no worse than mine. 

This is why we have worked so hard to create safe and supportive communities like Live Free, Live Free Wives, and Small Groups Online. Because people need a safe community when wrestling through all these things. They need others around them for purposes of support and feedback.

We all need help.
We all need to grow.
We can all be a better version of ourselves.

But most importantly we all need a safe place where WE KNOW we can come to the table, open-handed, and not be ridiculed, condemned, or ostracized for our willingness to acknowledge our problems and the integrity and conviction to address them.

The path to freedom is not a solo endeavor.

It’s not something you will discover in a vacuum. 

Freedom is an experience that ultimately involves others and requires authentic community.

Stop living in the shadows.
Stop being held captive by your fears and doubts.
Stop feeling like freedom will always elude your grasp.

Start investing in the loving relationships you need to be successful and so you can finally begin living in the freedom you’ve been seeking for so long!