Remember when the NFL referees were on strike last year and were replaced with unexperienced counterparts? Remember the resulting blown calls? If you don’t, I can tell you who does: Green Bay Packers fans, because the replacement refs blew a call on the final play one particular Monday night that gave the Seattle Seahawks a victory over the Packers.
Ask a Packer fan about it now, and they will likely *still* have a very strong reaction.
How is this important and how does it help you in your struggle with porn addiction? Because deep inside, most men have some core values, ones that will cause them to react strongly when they get violated. Things like that blown call? That’s one of them.
What are these values? They are:
Men tend to hate injustice, seeing or experiencing inequality.
We tend to dislike inept and ineffective decisions and wishy-washy leadership.
In the things we love, we want everything to be orderly.
But this creates a problem. As you look at your life and start owning up to your porn addiction, you have to face the realization you are violating these core issues. So you try to “fix yourself,” and if you fail, it eats away at you until you think, “Why would God continue to let me live like this without helping me?”
And when that happens you end up as easy prey to torment and accusation, leaving you feeling like there’s nothing you can do to get better. So you continue to hide, hating the mask you now constantly wear to cover who you really are inside as something inside seems to speak to you, “You’re a hypocrite and a fake.”
So what can you do?
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
But what does this look like in life? For me it was having to humble myself and reveal what I was really doing to someone I trusted. Sometimes this didn’t work, as a friend betrayed that trust, however; I kept on until I found some that I could be open and honest with.
It is really simple. Iron sharpening iron does not mean the men you’re accountable with are fixing issues in your life. Instead it is allowing another man to come alongside you in the midst of life’s struggles and just be there for you. Being supportive, not accusing, being able to protect you instead of tearing you down because of your behavior, yet also being able to call you out when you’re wrong.
Guys, find some real men to be accountable with. Men who will stand with you even when the worst about you is known. Doing this will strengthen and protect you as you go through this struggle and help you regain your dignity.