no secret just stories blogpostShame. It’s one great obstacle that can arise when trying to overcome any type of struggle. Most people who have an addiction of one type or another usually know their habits are destructive but have yet to bring themselves to the point of actually dealing with the issue. This is complicated by having an issue with something like porn because, unlike drugs or alcohol or even gambling, it is so much easier to keep secret. There is no dealer to have to meet up with, no checkout line at the store to pass through, no need for a secret bank account.

No. With porn, everything is there for free with a few clicks of a mouse or swipes of a finger.

What makes this one so much more difficult is that to get help, the user either has to get caught, which is hard to do if they are savvy, or they have to overcome immense personal anxieties and “turn themselves in,” so to speak, essentially revealing to the world that there is a problem nobody else needed to know about.

The fact is we all have our stories, our accounts of our path from birth to who we are today. And most of the time we enjoy telling our story — but it’s always our version. (Tweet This) An edited version in which we selectively share the parts of our life that help us to sculpt the persona we wish to leave in the mind of the listener. Most of us fear what people might think of us if they ever knew “the truth” about us. As a result, it is quite easy to become insecure in almost every relationship we have because we know deep down the person we have presented to the world isn’t the real me. We fear that if our circle were ever to discover the real me or the real you, they might be mortified and cast us aside. In that situation we don’t really have a story…..we have a secret.

But what would happen if we had the ability to be transparent with our lives and let people see the good, bad, and ugly? Might we lose some relationships? Well, maybe. But on the other hand, we could take heart in the friendships of those who remain by us with the assurance that the person we have offered them isn’t some fraud but is in fact the real deal. We can rest in the truth that they really truly care about us because in those relationships there are no secrets.

Just stories.


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