“Consuming pornography does not lead to more sex, it leads to more porn. Much like eating McDonalds everyday will accustom you to food that (although enjoyable) is essentially not food, pornography conditions the consumer to being satisﬁed with an impression of extreme sex rather than the real.” – Virginie Despentes
On November 1st, 2012 I started training for a half-ironman. The race isn’t until June, but if you know anything about triathlons, then you understand it takes several months of training to prepare your body for competition on race day. I don’t just wake up and go train, though. A good friend of mine has helped me put a plan in place for each month so I know exactly which days I’m swimming, biking, or running. Effectively preparing for race day requires more than just the physical training. I learned early on in my first month of training that committing to a disciplined diet was half the battle.
Last evening, my wife and I were traveling to Pittsburgh to visit her family for Easter. We had a 4-hour drive and as we got off the Pennsylvania Turnpike, we realized we needed to stop and get some dinner. Our choice was fast food, and I paid the price this morning. Today’s training was a ninety-minute bike ride. My body did not cooperate. I was cramping, about to throw up, and felt very slow. The spicy chicken sandwich and fries I ate the night before tasted absolutely delicious in the moment, but I was not very satisfied 12 hours later.
Here’s the deal – my goal is complete a half-ironman in June. Not only do I want to complete it, I am actually hoping to be somewhat competitive. Anyone reading this blog would agree that there is absolutely no chance of me accomplishing my goal if I were to choose to eat fast food on a regular basis. Sure, it tastes good, but it does nothing to fuel my body effectively for competition. It consists of processed food, grease, and God only knows what else.
My experience with fast food and my triathlon is fairly similar to a person consuming pornography. One reason a person consumes and views pornography is to fuel and satisfy a sexual desire inside of them. As men, I think it’s safe to say that we view pornography, get sexually charged, and release that charge by masturbating. It’s in this moment of viewing the porn and masturbating that is similar to my experience in eating the fast food. It feels good and satisfies the craving. However, doesn’t that feeling immediately go away once we’re done? It’s in that moment when guilt, shame, and turmoil are all of a sudden present and we realize that consuming and viewing the porn really didn’t get us sex – it was fake sex. In fact, it’s in that moment when we most often realize that consuming pornography to satisfy our sex drive was not reality at all. So, what happens? Well, we go back to it…over and over again. It’s a cycle that repeats itself. Porn never gives us the real thing. It’s fake, and it’s as simple as that.
I’m here to remind each of you that consuming pornography is a lot like eating fast food on a regular basis. You may think in the moment that it’s leading you to more sex, but it’s not. It’s lying to you and will have severely damaging effects – just like fast food had damaging effects to me this morning. I certainly didn’t experience a better workout, and I promise that you will not experience better sex. The only thing you’re going to experience is more lies and deceit.
My goal is to compete in a half-ironman. I will never experience the absolute best race if I keep consuming fast food. It’s as simple as that. Your goal may be focused on experiencing more sex. Here’s what I will tell you – you’ll never experience the absolute best sex if you keep consuming porn. It’s as simple as that.