‘Tis the season, as they say, and like it or not; one of the highlights of the season approaches very quickly.
Of course, I am talking about Christmas.
That being said, with just 5 days left in the shopping season amidst strange store hours, limited capacities, and a surge of online shopping causing long shipping delays…
You may be sitting there still wondering how you’re going to get it all done.
How are you going to get all the gifts for all the people in your life with just two weeks to go?
So with that in mind, I’m going to give you some quick gift-giving advice.
First thing, keep your list short.
- Who is “deserving” of your gifts?
- Who do you want to focus your generosity on?
For me it’s pretty simple.
- First, there’s God. That’s a given because he’s the author of all good gifts.
- Second is my wife.
- Third are my kids
- Then the rest of my family and friends.
- And then myself. Yes, I’m on that list as well!
As far as what I am giving them? That will vary by the individual.
But, I can tell you one gift idea that everyone on that list will appreciate very much and enjoy more than the latest video game console.
And that’s this… COMMITMENT.
Commitment is one of life’s true treasures. It’s something that everybody appreciates, and something that everyone on that list desperately wants from you.
They want commitment.
- God wants you to be a committed disciple.
- Your wife wants you to be a committed husband.
- Your children want you to be committed father (or mother).
- Your family and friends also want you to be committed to them
And ultimately you should want commitment from yourself.
Commitment to moving forward and improving.
For many of us, especially when we’re dealing with things like porn and sex addiction, we feel the gift we need to give all these people (including ourselves) is perfection.
However, here’s the rub.
No one on that list (except you) expects perfection. Not even God.
Ironically, the only person on that list that can assure they get the gift of commitment is also you.
Perfection, or maybe you might say the gift of sobriety if we’re talking about porn and sex, is an ideal that we should all shoot for.
But at the end of the day, the people in your life would much rather see genuine commitment from you than just a sustained period of mistake-free living.
Even your spouse.
If you’re a man, while your wife may get frustrated by your slip ups and indiscretions, they get even more so frustrated and hurt by your apathy and the lack of commitment.
They want a husband who is not only committed to them, but committed to the path of becoming the best husband they can be.
- The most faithful…
- The most loyal…
- The most dependable…
- The most honest…
And again, we’re all human so it’s understood that we’re going to have our share of ups and downs, our good days and our bad.
But the one thing should never waiver is our commitment to getting better, to growing and improving each and every day.
That is a gift that’s worth its weight in gold.
You see while so many of us see perfect sobriety as the ultimate gift, the reality is it’s a byproduct of the ultimate gift.
It is your commitment to growing, your commitment to learning, your commitment to doing the work that will ultimately lead to lasting sobriety and more importantly, freedom.
Perfection is a noble ideal. It’s what we see as the finish line. But a commitment to progress is what’s going to get you to that finish line.
You need to move forward.
You need to stay committed to the path.
Even though you’re going to have days when you feel very frustrated and want to throw in the towel on your recovery, your marriage, and possibly your family… you need to stay committed to the ideal that you will do whatever it takes to move forward and become a better version of yourself.
Not just for them, but for you too!
So yeah, feel free to go out there and brave the crowds, pick up those game systems, boots, sweatshirts, or whatever else is on the shopping list of those you love.
But at the end of the day, make sure that the one gift you give to those you love this year is solid and steady commitment.
They will appreciate that far more than anything else you have to give them, and you will as well.
By the way, if you are a man and ready to begin your journey of commitment but aren’t quite sure where to start, try committing to a life of transparency, accountability, and learning in the Live Free Community.