There was once a time in my life when porn played a big part of who I was. Being a part of XXX Church has actually made me aware of my past and how much porn I consumed. I use to think that I just looked at it occasionally. But have come to realize that porn played a bigger part, a much bigger part. I can remember looking at porn as early as elementary school and having my best friend pull out the wrinkled pages on the playground and we really couldn’t see much at first due to the way he folded it. It didn’t take him long to figure out how to keep the folds off the “good stuff”. As I entered high school my friends parents would go out of town we would stay at his house and watch porn all night. When we got the Internet man that opened up a whole new world to me. I remember one day sitting down at the computer around 7pm. I was like a kid in a candy store. I was looking for everything and I found it. Next thing I knew it was 2am. You know what? After sitting at the computer for 7 hours I still walked away feeling empty and guilty for wasting that much time on porn. I must not have felt to bad I did it again and again. I wasted too much time on something so damaging. I will admit that I thought that my wife should be like and do what these women on the screen were doing and that she should enjoy it. No matter how degrading it was. In my mind all women were like the ladies on the screen. I telling myself that every women deep down is a nympho. Boy was I wrong!I was blinded by my own selfish sexual desire. I wanted what I saw. I have come to learn that porn was and is not the answer to fulfilling my sexual desires. It was a dangerous outlet.
I have not looked at porn in years and have learned several things. First porn is not educational. Second porn is not sexually fullfilling it always leaves you feeling empty. Porn is not foreplay. Porn is takes control. Porn destroys families. Porn can lead to prison. Porn breaks trust. Porn consumes. Porn lies. Most important PORN KILLS.
If you are struggling I urge you to get seek help. You can use this site or others out there to help start your road to recovery. I want to leave you with one of my favorite verses I have used it on blogs before but It never gets old.
“Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Matt 11:28