Why Is Freedom So Elusive?

Freedom is a term that carries with it a real message of hope. Those living in the USA understand that possibly better than anyone, since freedom is the very concept our entire nation was founded upon.

In the church world we talk about “freedom” a lot, in particular the freedom that comes with knowing Jesus as one’s Savior. One might argue that “freedom” has served as the banner cry for Christendom throughout the ages. After all, freedom in Christ has inspired gazillions of sermons, almost as many books, and was something that the apostle Paul wrote about quite extensively.

Freedom is also a term we throw around often when it comes to porn addiction and recovery. This is especially true within the context of faith-based recovery, where many believe that if Jesus is not involved in the process of recovery, “freedom” is essentially impossible.

However, here is where it gets complicated.

If Jesus promises us freedom, and if those struggling with porn and other forms of sexual addiction desire freedom, then why do so many Christian men (and women) find it seemingly impossible to escape the grasp of their addiction and compulsive habits? Especially since they (in theory) have the one essential ingredient for success? That being Jesus.

Honestly, it’s a great but uncomfortable question.

Let’s be real, the numbers aren’t favorable. If you look at the current state of the church when it comes to the issue of porn, it’s clear that not many people are experiencing “freedom” in this area of their life.

In fact a Barna study revealed the following:

• Over 50% of Christian families admit that porn use is a problem in their home.
• 20% of youth pastors admit to currently struggling with porn.
• 53% of all pastors within the last 12 months have learned that someone they know in ministry struggles with porn.
• 59% of practicing Christian married men have sought a pastor’s help for porn use.

And those are just some of the many less than ideal statistics.

Additionally, while we do see some people who eventually find recovery, restoration, and “freedom,” the rate of success isn’t stellar. I’d say, by and large, more people end up giving up on their recovery rather than pursuing it to completion. This is something I have seen over and over again.

Go one step further. What do we say about those who claim they found freedom at some point, only to relapse years later when life hits them in the face like a 300lb boxer?

Why is this?

• Is it a problem with current recovery models?
• Has the Bible just lied to us and our faith systems failed us?
• Is porn use not really a problem in the first place?
• Is it even possible to get free?
• Is it something else?

Or is it that we just don’t understand what “freedom” really means, or what it actually requires?

In other words, is freedom really that elusive, or are we just approaching it with the wrong mindset?

I’d argue it’s the latter. Most of us have quietly confused freedom with relief. We think freedom means the urges finally go quiet, the guilt lifts, and life gets easier. So when relief doesn’t come, or comes and then leaves again, we assume freedom failed us. But relief was never the goal. Freedom was never promised to feel easy. It was promised to be worth it, in the same way choosing a harder, values-aligned life has always cost something for anyone who’s ever pursued it.

The reality is there are certain aspects of freedom we must recognize and appreciate to truly experience it. Because if we don’t, our understanding of freedom will be skewed and will lead us to false conclusions, and even resignation. That’s the thread we’ve been pulling on this month, and it’s worth sitting with a little longer here, because if you approach the concept of freedom with the right frame of mind, your chances of experiencing it will increase greatly.

And that’s what we are after in the end. Helping people experience real freedom in their life, not just simple sobriety.

This is exactly why we built X3Pure Rewired. Not as another program focused on managing behavior or gritting your teeth through another set of rules, but as a way to actually understand what’s driving the behavior in the first place, so you can build a life defined by real, lasting freedom instead of white-knuckled restriction. Learn more about Rewired here.