A number of parents have written me over the past year explaining that when they confront their son or daughter about their use of pornography, their teenagers reply that what they do online is “their private business”.  So many of our kids have bought into the very popular myth that pornography is just “harmless fun”, and that they have the “right” to their own private life online. 

Firstly, it’s my belief that while we foot the bill and provide a home for our kids, that they should also show some respect for the values and standards that we set.  But, as we started to discuss earlier this month, it’s also important not only to establish rules, but also to talk to our children about how the content we take in influences our behaviors.  When it comes to pornography, not only does pornography pose risks to the porn user, but pornography can also be linked with many societal wrongs, including sex trafficking, violence against women and sexual assault.

A recent content analysis of the 50 best-selling adult videos revealed that across all scenes:

  • 3,376 verbal and/or physically aggressive acts were observed.  
  • On average, scenes had 11.52 acts of either verbal of physical aggression, ranging from none to 128.
  • 48 percent of the 304 scenes analyzed contained verbal aggression, while more than 88 percent showed physical aggression.  
  • 72 percent of aggressive acts were perpetrated by men.
  • 94 percent of aggressive acts were committed against women.

One study conducted interviews with 200 prostitutes found that about a quarter of them mentioned pornography being intimately tied to a sexual assault they had experiences, with the abuser making reference to something they had seen as inspiration for his acting or insisting that the woman enjoy the assault.

In a study by the Poppy Project in the U.K., women had photographs taken of them by traffickers/pimps, for example, while a gang-rape was taking place, meaning that some of the content that your kids could be watching online could be the actual recording of real sexual assault.  Women also reported that in the places they were trafficked, pornography was constantly available to men buying sex. Further, some of the women’s traffickers watched pornography regularly. These women were repeatedly raped by the traffickers, with one of these women stating that her trafficker used pornography prior to, and during, his repeated rapes of her.

Pornography is used in sex trafficking and the sex industry to train women and children what to do: In a survey of 854 women and men in the sex industry in nine different countries, half of them reported that pornography was used to train them as to what to do in the sex industry.  In another survey in the U.K., 35% of trafficked women were exposed to pornography in the course of being trafficked, including being shown pornography to ‘groom’ them into prostitution.  In discussions with a former federal and state prosecutors, they indicated that in many of the cases prosecuted, the offenders utilized pornography to groom and train women and children for prostitution, commercial sexual exploitation, and other illegal sex acts.  

If your kid has bought into the lie that pornography is just harmless fun, it’s time to educate them with the facts.  Porn isn’t just a private matter, instead, the pornography business can support and promote sex trafficking, harm against women and global injustice.