Masturbation. It’s not a topic that typically comes up around the dinner table. It probably doesn’t come up around any table if your kids are there no mater where that table is. It’s just one of those things you hope you don’t have to deal with. And if you accidently catch your kids in the act, then that could be one of the most embarrassing and awkward moments in both your lives. Masturbation. Just the sound of the word could make you want to stop this reading right now. But read on for your kids’ sake.  

Is masturbation wrong or a sin? That has been a topic of much debate. And if the answer was: “Yes”, that’d be an easy out for some parents. “Masturbation is a sin! Don’t do it”, they’d say and that’d be the end of it. No such luck for them, though, because biblically there are no direct answers to that question. The Bible doesn’t specifically address masturbation, so the conversation with your kids about it isn’t so black and white.

To get more clarity on the topic we can look at God’s intention for sex. We see in the Bible that God created sex for a married man and woman to experience together. Masturbation happens alone. No husband. No wife. What takes the place of the person we were created to experience sex with when we masturbate? Often it’s the fantasies of the mind and the Bible has plenty to say about impure thoughts. That is something we can talk about with our kids, purity of the mind. 

We can also talk to our kids about how masturbation can follow them into their marriages. If our kids’ get into a pattern of masturbation that includes sexual fantasies why would that magically stop just because they walked down an aisle? They have spent years replacing their future spouse with numerous other men or women. That’s a lot of baggage to bring into a marriage and can harm the beautiful gift of sex God meant for them to experience with their spouse. Reality can have a hard time living up to fantasy and if the reality doesn’t measure up masturbation can be its replacement. That’s not a recipe for a health sex life.

Parents talk to your kids about masturbation coupled with the things I’ve mentioned above. Because if you don’t, they may end up in an embarrassing and awkward situation trying to explain why they’re masturbating to their spouse.