Cleaning up from the wreckage of our past can be a daunting task. It may require us to make an amends for any wrong we may have done or for any hurt we may have caused. An amends might be a new concept for us or we may think, “If I am already forgiven by God who else do I need to be forgiven by?” What we have to understand is that an amends isn’t so much about what we have done it’s more about our future. How can we ever expect to have healthy relationships if we are still trapped in the shame and guilt of the failed relationships in our past? Luke 6:31 says, “Do to others as you would like them to do to you.”
On the other side of the coin you may have been the one who has been hurt and you have been unwilling to forgive the person who may have caused that hurt. You may have had absolutely nothing to do with the hurt that you have experienced. What we have to realize is that it’s not the act of forgiveness we should be concerned about it is the outcome, which is the sense of peace and serenity we will get when we release our hurt through forgiveness. Luke 6:35 in The Message translation tells us, “I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return.” A heart filled with hate is far worse then the hurt that caused it to harden.
My porn addiction has caused me to have many failed relationships in my past which I still carry guilt and shame for. All I knew how to do in a relationship was take, I never gave anything of myself it was always about me. I am a very selfish, self seeking person when I am separated from God. I have apologized time and time again for my lust driven actions only to find myself destroying another relationship. For me it’s not the verbal amends that I need to make it is the living amends that I have to apply to my daily life.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God.”
Matthew 5:9