When the words recovery and accountability are used, most don’t think of the wives of sexual addicts needing them. Usually, we tend to gear those words toward the addict. But the truth is recovery and accountability are crucial for spouses. On top of that, healthy recovery and accountability don’t happen in isolation.
Most of the women I know long for friendships that offer love, growth, acceptance, to name a few. How much more then do we need those things when we are struggling?
If you’re reading this and you are anything like I was when my husband was addicted to porn, you tell anyone that will listen because you are drowning and have no safety net. This causes all sorts of issues in those relationships because those people do not really understand. On the flip side, you could be drowning with no safety net and are not speaking to a soul about what’s going on. This causes all sorts of issues for you and your spouse because no one is asking for help.
Either option is not the greatest and ultimately won’t lead to any sustainable healing.
What we need as a spouse is REAL community that offers roads to recovery through accountability. We need to be seen, valued, heard, and accepted.
We need to know that we are not alone in this and there is hope.
That is what we strive to offer here. Our communities aren’t just one more checkmark to make on your list of things to do in order to heal. These places are for vulnerability; for raw emotions and trustworthy people to walk alongside us in the journey. These places are safe, yet offer hard truth when needed.
This type of community offers space for true healing.
According to a paper written by Tulane University, isolation and loneliness cause a slew of mental and physical health issues including but not limited to anxiety, depression, cardiovascular health, dementia, and immune function. So, not only does living in isolation make it just about impossible to heal from betrayal, it could also be causing some serious side effects.
That is why we believe so strongly in being in community. We truly believe that when a person begins to share about their struggles and hurts with people that “get it” they begin the road to recovery.
You no longer feel alone or like you have to figure it out all by yourself when you are in a group of people that are safe. And, quite honestly, when we don’t want to walk in community it’s usually due to shame. Shame that makes it so difficult to want to step into a community because you feel that no one will understand or that no one will like you.
That is not what Live Free is about.
In fact, our founder and CEO, Carl Thomas, even wrote a book about shame. I recommend it to any and everyone that is struggling because shame stops us from doing so many things, like joining a group, that are healing.
Is that you? Do you need to begin recovery because your spouse is addicted to porn or having affairs or other sexual betrayals?
If it is, I urge you to not let the shame that you may be feeling stop you from taking the first step into healing and freedom. Join our FREE spouse’s community Live Free Wives.
Start finding accountability to keep you on track, resources to inform you and lift you up, and people that will walk alongside you the whole way. That is where healing and recovery truly happen.