A teacher I knew in high school used to tell me, “women use sex to get love and men use love to get sex.” Do you think that’s true? I happen to agree whole heartedly with that statement.

Growing up I spent a lot of time seeking love in all the wrong places. When I wasn’t getting it the way I thought I should I used sex as a tool to “feel” loved. The closeness of someone else was just the emotional fill I needed. That’s what separates love and sex.

Love is emotional. It connects people heart to heart and is much more than any physical act. Sex however can and is used all over society as a mere physical act. Yes for those of us who are married it connects us physically to our spouse and for those who are physical touch people, it fills your love tank. However sex itself is an act that can be done without feeling any love.

God created us to desire one another and scripture tells us that sex is good and love is the greatest command. Why then are their times when sex makes us feel unloved?! Is it possible that Satan has taken this amazing gift from God and used it to destroy us? Isn’t that what pornography is, sex changed and used to destroy us? It leaves us questioning everything we know about sex and love with our only answers coming from some producer that see’s sex only in his/her image?

Have you felt that way before? Have you felt lost wondering why your attempts to be loved end in rejection and hurt? Maybe it’s time to stop looking for love in the wrong places, as I did for many years and instead look up at your heavenly father. There is no other greater love than the love of your heavenly daddy who wants nothing more than to show you how beautiful and valuable you are.

Sex is amazing, Love is unconditional and amazing unconditional joy is found in Christ.