So here you are heading downtown to an appointment minding your own business and you turn onto the next street. You look up and you notice that cars are driving on the wrong side of the road and right at you. Then your head clears up for a quick second and you realize that you are heading down a one way road and you are headed in the wrong direction. The first thing you do is to do whatever it takes to correct the situation, and turn yourself around heading in the right direction.
Not only driving can we head down a one way street in the wrong direction but, we also can do it with our own sin. The difference is whether or not we choose to turn back. Turning around and heading in the right direction before we cause a major accident. During my years of addiction, I have headed down many one way roads and had never turned back knowing; I was going the wrong way.
So many times I remember sitting at my desk looking at porn and saying to my self “this has got to stop”. I am going in the wrong direction, I am ruining my life, and my marriage.
Sneaking out of my bedroom at night making sure all were asleep so I could watch hours of porn on our home computer and thinking to my self “She would kill me if she knew this”. How could I turn around if she found me doing this?
Convincing my wife to take the kids somewhere and I would stay home telling her I was not feeling good. So as I watched porn sitting there thinking “this is killing my relationship with my family; it has to stop” Knowing what I was doing and the damage that was being created. Thing is I never turned around.
Yes; I wanted to do it knowing things were going to be ugly if I kept going this way. Yes; I wanted to quite the destructive path I was on but, Me, MYSELF, I could not do it. No; I could not do it by myself and you will not be able to do it by yourself either. Man, do not kid yourself if you think you can. Because to many ahead of you have tried and failed only to find themselves facing down the wrong way of a one way street, looking at destruction, again.
People have said “Brian I have prayed to God and he will deliver me from this”. He will restore my marriage. You are right He can do amazing things but, He will not just stick out his finger and zap you with the cure all. He will however put people in your life, direct you toward groups, and will LOVE you no matter what you may have done or will do.
It all comes down to this you will not be able to do it alone or by yourself. Yes; God is the first step in this healing process and you need to fall down on your face and confess this to him and let him know that you understand that Jesus died for this very sin you have been fostering. You need to tell someone else about this and get accountability and help as you move through this battle in your life. You need someone who will grab that wheel and turn you back around in the right direction.
Let it be known, it might take awhile to get off of the one way street. It might even mean that some things get broken. Why is it so easy to see that what we are doing is wrong for us and our families, but we continue to do the wrong things? We do not know right now what plans God has for us. But stand firm in your faith and trust in your friends and family. They may have to take over the driving, but they will help take you on the healing journey.
Brian & Darcy