I think something we hear from a lot of the men on here is that pornography makes us view women differently. For a long time, it was really easy to dissociate from these kinds of comments, puffed up because my view of women remains relatively respectful and pure. But what about our view of men? How does pornography affect our view of men?
Pornography poisons the hearts of men and creates a new, corroded lens to view its characters. As men viewing other men, we form a lustful, shamed, and fantastic view of men that does not translate into the world of real-life men. Our male friends, co-workers, and brothers in faith suffer when we quickly retreat from true brotherhood because of our selfish fantasies that confuse their image.
Men become objectified and no longer brothers to walk toward Christ with. As the lens of pornography becomes solidified, we no longer see men to help, love, listen to, sing beside, work together with, or encourage in the faith. Men who lust after other men bleed the lifeblood from healthy male friendships, becoming isolated by feelings of inferiority, distance, and awkwardness.
Why do we become awkward around men? Because in the midst of a life held enslaved by pornography, we see men who had become lifeless and inhuman begin to breathe, hurt, laugh, need, cry, and worship. Most likely all of us have felt some degree of distance from other men but sexualizing them in pornography is exactly what not to do in order to bring together men in healthy, God-honoring brotherhood.
My suggestion is that you invest in the humanity of the brothers around you this week. Break the trend of the isolating effects of pornography as you try to break your addiction. Spend time with other men and support them, listen to them, joke around with them and pray with them. For every man you lust after, pray for them there. Ask the Lord to re-create your eyes to see clearly the world of men as He sees them.
Feel isolated by your broken view of other men? Turn off the porn and join men in the real, human world as we wait together for Jesus and not alone.