Happy Wednesday, Everyone.
So what do y’all think about this stuff?
1) My family actually lives in South Africa and so my mom and I were *just talking* about how…super counterproductive it is to allow porn channels into a country that has the most reported rapes in the world. More and more, I’m seeing that the world really is filled with not much more than lust and pride (I John 2:16) and why we’re supposed to be light in it (Matthew 5:14). It’s kind of like another article I checked out about a man who was caught with 2500 child porn images and yet, he was released because the judge doesn’t believe that he represents signs of being a real threat to children. Um, come again?
2) Oftentimes, women will write in to talk about the “fact” that since they are not into “real porn” but “fantasy porn” then it’s not “as bad”. Well, I personally don’t agree, but for those who do share in that sentiment, you might want to read about a man in New Zealand who was sent to prison for watching too much elf (yes ELF) porn. He had once been convicted of assaulting a teenage boy and since he was looking at *young elves*, they assumed he would pose some kind of threat. Hmph.
3) Speaking of odd and a bit disturbing, if you have a teenager in your life, you might want to read an article entitled “Teen Sex Culture: Line Blurred Between Sex and Rape“. As someone who mentored teen moms for six years, although it might be shocking to even think that the two things can be confused, for a lot of young people, they are. Kind of like how people (eh hem) “confuse” sex and porn. (I Corinthians 6:16-20-Message)
4) I also read an interesting article on a “kept man” (we used to call them giglos). The final couple of lines in his piece is something that we should think about when it comes to any kind of choices that we make: “Great sex and free rent are nice, but nothing can replace a person’s integrity and self-respect. I didn’t have it then. And that’s the part of me that was really broke.” What do you engage in that puts your integrity and self-respect on the line?
5) And finally, I am especially interested to hear your thoughts on an article that addresses that having more sex with an unfaithful spouse is not the “cure” for infidelity. Oh, there are so many layers to that because by the time adultery happens, oftentimes the marriage bed was *severely dysfunctional* (Hebrews 13:4, I Corinthians 7:5) to begin with; sometimes in ways that *both spouses* do not want to take personal accountability for. Anyway, I will say that another piece that was linked to that one that featured a sex worker offering marital advice did have some pretty good insights: “If you want your partner to do something for you that you like, make it appealing for them to do it, whether by doing something they like in return, or finding a way to make it more pleasant (though don’t fall into the trap of doing nice things as a tit-for-tat); Don’t push! Nothing makes people dig in their heels like being cajoled and pleaded with until they wear down. Respect your partner’s boundaries; If your partner comes to you with a fantasy or a desire that weirds you out, try to keep in mind that it’s a scary thing to trust someone enough to be radically honest, and start from there; Don’t take your partner being taken aback, uncertain, or awkward about something you’ve said as a personal affront. It’s probably not about you but their own reexploration of their own head.”
Definitely something to think about *and* to hear your thoughts on…