You certainly lined this one right up for me. Thanks. Kinda. I guess.
Sometimes, I’ll come across something online that I’m just *dying* to post on here…and the Comforter (John 14:26-AMP) won’t let me. “Let not your good be evil spoken of” (Romans 14:16) is all that keeps ringing in my ear and so, I won’t post the video that I saw that was “disturbingly pathetic” a couple of days ago. Let’s just say that it was an old(er) man…who appeared to be a very lonely man. He had a doll. He was fully clothed and even admitted that impotence was becoming one of his closest friends…and still, um, he had a doll.
I’m sure you get it.
I think hard and so a series of questions ran through my mind: Where is his wife, or what happened to her? Why did he spend *thousands of dollars* on one of those “sex robots” (I’m sorry, whether you’re a believer or not, those things should scare the day, and night lights out of you!). Why did he want to video tape his own PSA (Public Service Announcement) about the “benefits” of using one of those things?
Then, I awakened this morning to the news that Mr. Hugh Hefner (“Playboy” founder) is engaged, um, again (third time, I believe) to a (whew!) 24-year-old. OK, I did some quick roundabout math. I’m 36 and I have a great-grandmother who is 93 and still living. I am, what? 12 years older than Hefner’s fiancee’? He’s 84. So, that means that he’s old enough to be *her* great-grandfather. Ewww. Just ewww. And what’s a real trip? When I saw the press photo of them, my mind actually went back to that dude…and his doll. *Not good*.
And yet, although the Lord gives us all the power of discernment and so I comfortably will say that something about that seems really…strange, this blog isn’t so much about Hugh and Crystal. They say they love each other and to a certain extent, I get it. I basically wrote two books to date on what life is like when you base love on *your definition* rather than the Bible’s (I Corinthians 13:4-8). No, actually, this is a word of encouragement for those who, like me, are tempted to think, or say, or blog, or scream, “How is he on *three* when I’m not even on #1…yet?!?”
Bottom line, “Praise the Lord for it!”
I was just telling another single girlfriend of mine (who will be 41 in January) today that I think something that the thief (John 10:10), the Liar (John 8:44), Satan wants “singles who desire to be married someday status” women to forget is that every woman who’s single is SINGLE BY CHOICE, NOT CIRCUMSTANCE. Craig ‘n them live out in Vegas. I’m in Nashville. Oh, but if I was a betting woman, I would put all I have on the fact that *every single woman* (and man for that matter) reading this could be married if they wanted to just be married. In choosing not to settle for anything less than God’s best, you are not lonely, you are wise. You are trusting. You are faith-ful. As my mom just told me over this past weekend, “There may be a ‘good man famine’ in the world, but in God’s kingdom, there is everything that you need.” (You can check out more about that on my latest “On Fire” blog entry.)
I promise you that if I ever get to meet Mr. Hefner by some freak chance (no pun intended), I will ask him what he means (meaning what he’s thinking of) when he says he’s getting married. To be honest with you, I’m curious about the reasons behind why a lot of those in pop-ular culture *make* such a commitment…if they’re not going to *keep* the commitment; that if it’s not a faith-based union, to them, what exactly is it?
Yet in the meantime, I’m gonna stick to what the Word told me marriage is about and what Christ’s perspective was on the matter:
“But Jesus said, ‘Not everyone is mature enough to live a married life. It requires a certain aptitude and grace. Marriage isn’t for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought. Others never get asked—or accepted. And some decide not to get married for kingdom reasons. But if you’re capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it.'”—Matthew 19:11-12 (Message)
Old doesn’t make you mature. Single doesn’t make you desperate. And marriage, unfortunately, is not always based on a covenant. It should be…but it’s not. We should wait until, for us, it will be. As the Lord intended.
So, as we get ready to enter into a new calendar year, I’m not sure if that helped you or not (LOL). I know as a lot of my friends will be kissing their beloveds at the stroke of midnight, Friday night, and I’ll be…not kissing my beloved, I will choose to look at the bright side: “It could be worse. I could be marrying a man old enough to be my great-grandpa.”
And yet I’m not. BY CHOICE.
I love myself, my God and my future companion enough to wait. Until my engagement announcement doesn’t evoke a choir of “ewwwwws”. But most importantly, until my first will be my only. And my last.