The statistic reads 35%. It seems impossible to believe, but it is right there in black and white in the company’s annual report. It is a number that makes you shake your head and realize a tragic epidemic is upon us that will lead to serious consequences for individuals, relationships, and society.
The statistic appears in the 2021 annual report from Pornhub, which is known as the largest distributor of internet pornography in the world. According to its year-in-review report, 35% of visitors to its porn site during that year were women. Even more shocking was the statistic that this represented a 5% increase from 2020 numbers.
It may be difficult to wrap your head around this alarming number. Porn is supposed to be a man’s problem, right? Sure, we occasionally hear of women who say they watch porn with their significant other to spice up their sex life. But 35% of visitors to the biggest porn site in the world, being women, tells us this is no longer a male-only issue.
The Trend is Growing
According to an article in Psychology Today entitled “This is Why Many Women Watch Porn,” a University of Denver study of 1,291 couples showed 45% of the women reported viewing porn with their partners, while 30% watch it alone.
In a 2016 edition of the Journal of Sex Research, an article entitled Documenting Pornography Use in America: A Comparative Analysis of Methodological Approaches reported data from a 2014 survey revealing 16% of U.S. women viewed pornography during a given week.
There are hundreds of clinical studies that report similar findings, including a Swedish report of nearly 8000 women that reported 27% use pornography, with 8.6% viewing it 1 to 2 times a week. Basically, the data demonstrates women have been drawn into the cesspool of porn.
Now the pressing question becomes, why?
When Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction was released in 2018, it immediately impacted the treatment of sex and porn addiction. The Inner Child Model™ was seen as a new and unique method of treating this disorder by helping men understand why sex had a stronghold on their lives. It was embraced by many clinicians, including leaders in the field, who adopted this trauma-based model as part of their treatment regimen.
Over the years, numerous men throughout the world have experienced the success this model offers in helping them stay one step ahead of their porn and sex addiction by identifying their unresolved childhood pains, learning to sit with emotional discomfort, practicing mindfulness, and learning to tap deeper into their emotional selves. The Inner Child Model has been a welcome relief for many men who unsuccessfully tried numerous times to stop the addictive behaviors that shamed them.
And while enormous success has been seen with this therapeutic approach, I received one question repeatedly:
“Why did you write the book just for men? Don’t women struggle too?”
The simple answer was I only treated men for this condition. Although I have worked with women suffering from betrayal trauma, I have limited experience working with women who deal with love and porn addiction. Much of that experience occurred when counseling under the guidance of a supervisor in a residential addiction treatment program. There I worked with women who reported engaging in sexual activities that led to great shame and embarrassment.
Therefore, I didn’t have the same rich and robust data for women I had obtained in counseling with men over the years. Without this information, I could not identify the characteristics that make up the identities of women’s inner children. And, without that knowledge, writing a book on the subject – although very much needed – would have been reckless and unethical.
The Data is Here
I am happy to announce that after much research, Going Deeper for Women: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Love and Porn Addiction is in the works. Coauthoring with Lacy Alajna Bentley, author of Addicted to Love, and Heather Cronemiller, CSAT-C, the book will be released in late 2023.
If you would like to be added to the mailing list to obtain a notice when the book is launched, send your email address to [email protected].