I was interviewing to write for a website the other day (details to follow sooner than later) and there was something the editor said that I have been thinking about all weekend.
He asked me what I thought was one of the greatest consequences of fornication. (Galatians 5:19, Ephesians 5:3) My response? “That it puts you in a position to have to ‘start’ and ‘stop’. God never intended for sex to be that way.” And, I honestly believe that to be the case.
I mean, just look at what Paul wrote concerning marital sex:
“Do not refuse to give your bodies to each other, unless you both agree
to stay away from sexual relations for a time so you can give your time
to prayer. Then come together again so Satan cannot tempt you because
of a lack of self-control.”—I Corinthians 7:5 (NCV)
Is it just me or does that look like God intended for sex to go on…continuously…forever…well, on this earth? (Ecclesiastes 3:14, Matthew 19:6)
Oh, it just amazes me how the Enemy likes to put his manipulative spin on things. (John 10:10) When you’re single, he tempts you to have sex and then you struggle with finding the self-control to stop. When you’re married, BECAUSE HE KNOWS THE POWER OF MARITAL SEX (Genesis 2:24-25), he tries to distract you to not make sex with your partner a priority. BOTH ARE AN ISSUE…sex as a single is not a part of God’s design. NO SEX as a married person is also not a part of God’s plan/will for our lives.
I guess if this particular blog was for anyone in particular, I would have to say it was meant for the virgins and married people who check this out. If you have never had sexual intercourse, take it from me, it is a BEAST trying to deal with stopping this roller coaster ride once you’ve been on it. If you’re even on this site, I am assuming it’s because you are battling with lust on some level. You know, one thing that the Holy Spirit recently revealed to me is that ONE of the downsides of porn is that it’s a spectator sport. Not only are you involving yourself in something that is vile and, in many cases, unreal, but you are spending your time and energy on…you are bonding your mind and spirit to, something that God, in the right context…at the right time…with the right person doesn’t want you WATCHING, but DOING. Porn, at its basest level, is a form of settling….for so much less than God intended for you. Don’t let it (continue to) rob you of the pure (Hebrews 13:4) and beautiful experience he desires for you to have with a mate of your very own for the rest of your life. Sex isn’t just about a physical connection. Our hearts/souls and minds are supposed to be involved, too.
And, if you’re married, also take it from me, as a woman who is in the “start/stop” cycle, what God gave you is A GIFT and should not be taken lightly…or for granted. The Bible says that one of the times that Satan tries to attack a marriage is when there is no sexual activity going on. Do you know what that tells me? SEX IS A SPIRITUAL UNION…IT IS A FORM OF SPIRITUAL WARFARE. It is a surefire way to keep the Enemy at bay. Matthew 18:19 (NKJV) says, “‘Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven.'”
DO YOU SEE HOW MUCH POWER UNITY HAS?
I don’t have much more to say right now than that. If you’re single, especially if you’re a virgin, don’t start what you will eventually have to stop (if you’re not married). It is a kind of suffering that God never intended for any of his children.
If you’re married, you’ve started so don’t stop. It was a continual gift God always had in mind for you.
A month out from my (abstinence) annivesary, I see why God wanted me to wait. He knew restraining myself would be torture. Sex, in its original form, wasn’t designed with an “on/off” or “start/stop” button. Shoot, now that I think about it, I wasn’t either.
I’ll know better next time…when I’m married.