You know it’s funny when you think about the coined phrase that the world gives to people having sex. The phrase is called: “making love.” I have always wondered why it was never said that people were “taking part in love” or “being in love.” Simply now days when you hear that people are having sex, its most of the time: outside of marriage, lacking a real intimate relationship, or completely in the wrong context. I think that we should change the phrase to “making lust,” because in reality that’s what people are doing. Sex without love is simply gratifying one’s own selfish needs and seeking pleasure through instant gratification of the act driven by the feelings of lust.
When I was younger I used to look at pornography on a daily basis. I am not sure why I was so drawn to it. There was excitement and thrill in the act of watching. I was instantly infatuated by the sheer form of “action” that was depicted on the screen in front of me. But as time had gone by I started to become bored with pornography. Everything that I watched became the same to me: bland, dull, and impersonal. It came to a point where I asked myself “there has to be more to this.” Soon I was on a mission to find pornography that depicted love, passion and intimacy – people who had a true connection. I wanted to see what two people being in love looked like; I wanted to know what love within sex was like. After searching and searching, to my surprise I would never find what I was looking for. Why? Because pornography doesn’t show anyone what love is like, it’s only an outlet to display lust and the selfish sexual desires of people. Pornography takes away everything special and intimate that takes place within the act of sex and replaces it with the emptiness of lustful desire. Simply put, pornography is using people’s bodies through the act of sex to create an environment of lustful satisfaction for the viewer. This is not real nor is this intimate as far as sex goes. It is a cheap fix of pleasure to those who view it to gratify the tension and feelings of sexual lust.
I decided to look up the word “lust” in the dictionary today. The definition described: “1. intense sexual desire or appetite. 2. uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire. 3. a passionate or overmastering desire or craving.” As you can see, lust is a feeling that can be uncontrollable when not tamed, as cravings can become strong and even overmastering as it is defined. This is why pornography can become almost like an illusive drug to those who watch it. It supplies the materials needed to suppress the appetite of lust, creates the gratification of pleasure and desire that lust seeks out, as well it shows the viewer sexual attraction. There is a huge problem with this. Lust is NEVER satisfied. That’s right, it never goes away in the long run. If you keep feeding it, it will always want more. I’ve had to learn this the hard way through my struggle and pain in addiction to pornography. I would watch but never understand what was being fed to me. I would never understand that lust we being empowered to overtake my life; that temporary pleasure would cause me so much pain. I remember after every time I finished watching pornography I would feel guilt, shame and depression as pleasure left my body and reality set in. I would be ashamed as I realized that it was a continuous problem: my lust had been satisfied for the time being, but I knew it would be back.
You see, lust can be a very dangerous and addictive feeling. It is the reason pornography exists and why so many of us can become addicted to it. Lust seeks to be gratified through any way possible, including the use of porn. Lust seeks to be satisfied, it seeks to be fed; porn can become its food. Once you make a connection between seeking pleasure and how it is lustfully gratified through the use of viewing pornography, a person is going to psychologically lean towards the act. It’s a pathway of pleasure if you will. The same principle can be applied to drugs such as cocaine or heroine. People who become addicted to these substances use them as a way of seeking pleasure because a pathway was created psychologically knowing that these drugs will make them feel good temporarily. Lets be honest, pornography is a drug and it is addictive. It brings temporary pleasure to lustful needs and can blossom into an addiction and even take over people’s lives. Everyone likes feeling pleasure, would you agree? But the problem is that pornography excites the wrong pleasure. It excites the addictive qualities of lust and seeks to satisfy the desires of said lust.
Knowing is half the battle, and I truly believe it. Pornography is so openly available today that it absolutely boggles my mind. With a quick internet search you’re there and once exposed its difficult to go back. I believe that anyone who is viewing porn needs to know the severity of what truly is going on before their eyes — pornography uses lust to keep you coming back, it constructs a false reality of what intimacy is and feeds on pleasure to become an addictive force.