Every guy has his preference, so to speak. That one thing that when you’re
trying not to “look” that will get you every time. Your “tick”. I consider myself a decently
respectful guy toward the ladies, but when a gal walks in with those short shorts and
tan legs . . . I’m gone! I’ve heard once from a lady I truly admire, “The reason why so
many guys are falling and stumbling all over themselves is the way us girls dress.”
And typically, when an issue would arise, this lady would be on the side of the guys
saying, “You should dress more modest!” Ironically, the gals she was referring this to
were my best friends. They were dressing decent and if your mind can wander from
there, it can wander from a huge turtleneck sweater and baggy sweat pants. One thing
I’ve learned from having two gal best friends is: Respect. These gals I’m talking about
are gorgeous and very beautiful, so let me be honest. When I was first friends with
them, it was HARD.

Before I get started on respect, let’s get honest and transparent. What’s
your “tick”. I told you mine: Those short shorts and tan legs will catch my eyes every
time. What is it about a woman that every time she dresses like that, she catches your
attention (and you catch yourself in lust)? Are you like me with the shorts? Or, do you
prefer low-cut shirts? What’s your tick? Honestly, I don’t undress the gal from my tick,
but I sure will stare and steal some glances. What about you? Do you undress her or
just catch yourself staring?

Respect. Overall, this is a lost word in this generation. “You owe me respect.” “I’ll
respect you once you respect me.” What about the disrespect toward a woman when
your “tick” gets the best of you? Being such close friends with gals, I’ve gotten to know
what they think about this situation. Their question is: “Why can’t y’all just not look
lustfully? We look at you guys, but we don’t undress you.” The only problem with this
question is, it’s not that we can’t . . . we won’t. Guys, we know what looks good. And
we like it. Every time your “tick” enters the room, you are faced with the decision: To
undress and stare, or not. Maybe you don’t have a “tick” and you just lose it with no
matter what comes by, you’re still faced with the decision.

Lust vs. Attraction. We’ve found ourselves more confused than finding a
solution. We all know the verse (and may quote it in our heads while catching a
glimpse): But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already
committed adultery with her in his heart (Matt 5:28 NIV). But we’ve sometimes confused
attraction with lust. I know this may be some testy waters, but we’ve got to learn. Song
of Solomon says, “How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are
doves. (Song 1:15 NIV)” So I ask, how can he not make this observation without
looking? Does it require lust? Absolutely not! Here, Solomon is describing his lover’s
beauty. He had to look at her. He made the observation. He was attracted to her,
obviously. Usually, personally speaking, what draws my eyes to a girl first is attraction.
Her sheer beauty. Then from there we have the choice to either admire or lust. Keep
reading in Song of Solomon and you’ll find some very erotic poetry. The truth of the
matter is: God created attraction not lust. You can, in a way, look and observe beauty
by attraction, but once and if you think of lusting, RUN! 1 Corinthians 6:18 tells us to run 

from sexual immorality. If you look in observation because of attraction, lustful thoughts 

will be soon to come (usually). It boils down to temptation. Taking some that God 

created (attraction) and trying to replace it with something the Devil has counterfeited
(lust). What’s to learn here is this: Beauty is attractive and it drives us guys nuts. We
have the choice to either let our attraction produce lust or let our attraction produce . . .
a relationship. Honor a girl by saying, “Yeah, short shorts and tan legs may drive me
absolutely insane. I may look at the gal’s beauty due to my attraction, but I will not let
myself lust. I will run from it.” And don’t excuse lust with, “Oh, I’m just attracted to the
girl.” Hello?! You know what you’re doing! The underlying truth is (sorry for the
bluntness): We’re just horny, hormone driven teenage guys who like what we see and
need to “tame” ourselves with respect and God’s Word. Just as some food for thought:
Out of all those times being hung up lusting, you may have entirely missed your future
wife.