Questions

Hey guys, love the X3 watch it has truly helped me so far in my walk against porn. I just have a question for myself and the guys in my youth group. They were wondering if there is any free downloads for the accountability software. I know there is a free trial but is there any way of getting a free trail for more then 15 days? If there is I would love to know! thanks again and thanks you for all your help. God bless.

I’m wondering if you guys have suggestions to deal with the physical reactions of not masturbating, pain in the testicles, in the lower abdomen, discomfort. Also with the anxiety that comes with it.

I struggled with porn since my life became so bitter and sad from the embarrassments anger and insecurities. My whole life people picked on me called me names and bullied me when i was young. I also grew up in a dysfunctional relationship with my parents and siblings so often I was alone throughout my whole life. I been in fights arrested and a gang which I got jumped pretty bad and i ended up in a hospital. My views with women I had has changed in 7th grade when the girl I liked told me I was gonna be a crack head in the future it made me feel low. But I only dated one girl and it didn’t go well I was young and immature yet she liked me and I really didn’t know how to handle it we broke up. I developed a masturbation addiction at 13 years old and It has ruined my relationship immensely with God women and my family. I have robbed people sold drugs and jumped people and been in and out of jail since I was 14-17 but I gave my life to Jesus 2008 and I accepted him as lord and savior. It was good and I became a member at the time but I started to fall back in that same masturbation addiction. I left my friends because they were only into the party scene and living their life and the temptations were there so I barely talk to them. But down the road I worked in many jobs and I had never held a job for more than two years. So I told my cousin and my friend about my porn problem they didnt understand and looked at me funny. I kept on continuing with my addiction and I had to go to the hospital because i was in a great fear and so weak this hurted me for so long. I wasnt a frequent user of maturbation and porn when I was younger but when I got to high School it seemed to progress and it kept me in bondage from my high school until now. Now Im going to College and Im praying and renewing my mind from porn but every day im challenged with being alone with no one to connect to on my issues of being a christian man and grow. By the way I stopped going to church I have no a fear of commitment. I tried going back one time with old friend but He dosent fully understand that I hate when Im reminded about what I did in the past so I stopped calling him to go to church. Im so stressed some days Im 23 and I turn 24 in December I have no job no car to go any where. sometimes I feel no girls find me attractive and if they do Im too afraid to walk up to them because I have such a big fear and guilt and I think it scarred me pretty deep. I have been constantly masturbate for the last 10 years porn for 7 years and its been hell for me ever since this happen. Im discouraged and Jesus is the one I still look to for answers but I just get so afraid because I think god dont like me for being so careless sometimes. I read the word and I know jesus is real because I found a lot peace and truth but my life I feel so much trauma from the past abuse neglect and unworthiness. I still resent of making those friend. now I live alone without none of my friends. I feel a lot of pain so I use porn to cope with it and it has failed me over endlessly. Yes I want a girlfriend but I dont know how or what to look for and If im looking for one this probably cant be done until I get treated or help from the state I am. Thanks and I hope that was not too much please pray for me Frismer.