Questions

Frequently Asked Questions.

Shame

I’ve been in a committed relationship for over a year and I plan on marrying my girlfriend. She’s the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. For the first 9 months of our relationship I didn’t feel any lust at all. Everyone else just faded away. Now I’ve been struggling with temptation. The other day, when I was exhausted, I logged on to a porn website. I feel so much shame right now and I don’t know what to do. I’ve confessed this to the Lord and to my accountabililty partner. I feel like my girlfriend will leave if I tell her. This has not been a continual problem for me and I have software on my computer to help keep the temptation away. If you have any advice, I’d appreciate it.

Joe,

If you plan on marrying this women some day you need to be open and honest with her about this. If you are not it will come back to haunt you in the end when she catches you when you are married.

I would first talk to someone else who you think would be a good person to hold you accountable to this though. Sit down talk about your struggle, your triggers (Being tired), and build a battle plan to stop this. Let her know this when you talk and tell her that you do not want this sin to be a part onf your relationship so you have gone to great lengths to battle this.

Dude… this is a huge part of marriage, communication, trust, and friendship. If you do not start your relationship off this way it will not exist in your marriage.

GF of one months admitted to having problem with masterbation

So My christian GF of about a month tolled me she has a problem with masturbation. She says that it’s done and she over it….My fist response is to support her as her BF but I am not sure if this is the best thing for us….What should I do

I would talk with her more about this and ask her what her steps are to stop this. Has she developed a plan to remove this from her life?

I do not think it would be good for you to be here direct accountability partner but, she should really find someone that she knows who can hold her to her goals. Someone who she sees often and would be able to talk with her face to face about what she struggles with.

Trying to forget about porn pleasure.

How can some one leave masturbation behind?

With accountability, prayer, and replacing it with something else. The thing is we make this a habit and like any habit we need to replace it with something else in our lives.

Dive into the word and get more into God. Pray and work on your self control as this is one are that many Christians and just people need to mature in.

Talk to someone you know about it and build up that accountability around you. share what you are going through and I can tell you from experiance that things will show up in front of you that you never thought about before that cause you issues.