Questions

What is masturbation?

My husband is in the service and I have heard the wives speaking of the guys using masturbation for relief while deployed. So I looked it up on the internet under Christian Views on Masturbation, and found so many different views on the topic. Some said it is wrong while others said it is a way to remain faithful to your spouse so that you don’t, “go out on them”, while even one other had called it solo something, stating that as long as you were only using images of your spouse to get the arousal or no images in the act then it is helpful to do so to keep your body and mind free from sexual sin.

So I am so confused. Is it okay for them to do this or not?

My boyfriend and I have been talking dating for nearly a year and have been talking about marriage for the past few months. He was looking for rings and I was looking at dresses. Then last night he confessed to me that he has been struggling with an addiction to pornography for the past five years.
He became a believer while in college and began battling it soon after his conversion. He had already informed me (briefly) of a previous sexual relationship and that he had previously struggled with pornography, but I had believed that this was part of his past. He has “only” slipped one time since we’ve been dating, but that was when he was extremely stressed out. Of course, it’s easy to be consistent when life is going well. There seems to be a lack of faith in God- in this area but also in other areas that might cause stress. He has an accountability group and a mentor, but his accountability partners are also currently struggling with this. Should he be in accountability with someone who has overcome this?
I can’t explain the pain in my heart that accompanied his confession. I never thought this was something the man I wanted to marry would struggle with. My heart breaks that he is struggling with this and how it makes me feel inadequate and not worth his total love. However, more than that- the trust in our relationship has been broken. He hid this for so long, how can I trust him again?
I suppose my question is how to help him, but more than that- should our relationship progress before he has overcome this? Should we even be in a relationship? At one point I was positive God had put this young man in my life and now I’m wondering if it would not be better to be single for the rest of my life than be with someone whose faith seems so small.

A friend of mine has homosexual tendencies. He wants to know if there are any support groups or help available as he really desires to change and live a happy life with his wife. Can you confirm of any such groups he can join?