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Get insight, advice, and encouragement from our community of writers on the topics of porn addiction and sexual integrity.
Frequently Asked Questions.
What support is there for spouses? I was hoping to find a spouse group on your site, but I did not see one. I am supporting a friend that has no idea how to handle her husbands sexual addiction – he is at a treatment center and she is devastated. She is struggling finding anything to support what she is going through and I was hoping to direct her to a group or other supporting contacts on this site.
We do have an entire section for spouses with blogs, resources and so much more. If you are looking for a group you may want to consider the X3groups for spouses. Counseling for wives is also available through a 4 month program that Pure Life Ministries offers.
Hi,
currently I am separated with my wife. During our relationship we were active sexually, and since she has been gone I’ve missed her so much and the physical urges have been stronger. I’ve struggled and every time I have urges I allow myself to look at a picture of her and masturbate to it. I’ve struggled since I was 12 years old with pornography today I avoid it as much as possible but the memories of my wife makes it so hard and the sensations become strong. I don’t know how to overcome it, it’s been this way for a long time, and killed the intimacy with my wife she got to the point where I was no longer seducing her, that she just undressed and let me be. Anger played a big role due to the feeling of rejection. What can you say about my situation? I want to submit to Christ.
I’d say that if you are both not in marriage counseling, get there. The marriage is not going to survive living separately if you are not working on the marriage during this season. Have you ever heard the term “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” ? I believe it is true… for someone else.
The grass always looks greener on the other side.
Fight for your freedom. Fight for your marriage. Get some counseling. Get into an accountability group. Take drastic steps to break free and show her you are serious about winning her back!
How long does it take junk mail to clear up after you stop viewing porn? I confronted my husband’s porn use three months ago. He said being accountable to me has kept him sober but his spam mail folder makes me doubt his truthfulness. It is still littered with the junk emails as before. I want to believe him, but he lied about his porn use for thirteen years. How can I gain his trust? How do I restore my trust in him?
He should probably get a new email. Once on a list that email address can get sold over and over and over again. If he is going through porn- spam on a regular basis then he is setting himself up for another fall.
With regards to trusting him again. Trust is not something that is automatic. Love is. We don’t withhold love but you can certainly withhold trust until it is earned. It takes time. He’s not going to be perfect and you will need to have the love of God in you to extend it and mercy. Be sure you are getting the accountability you need as well.
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